Tony Abbott Unplugged

Parody Account
Suppository of Wisdom. Climate Change Scientist & Noble Prize winning Virologist. Patriot, Linguist. Diplomat. Eco-Nut &Budgie smuggler. PARODY!

[Tony Abbott Unplugged @FakeTonyAbbott1]

How good is being white in Australia? I assaulted both men and woman at Uni, beat @JoeHockey unconscious, inflicting brain damage. Other violent thugs would be jailed, but you vote me PM with an OBE! What blackfella could do that?! https://t.co/02VvOYjs61
https://t.co/TpnSLj2FrF

[Tony Abbott Unplugged @FakeTonyAbbott1]

@newscomauHQ Some people, like me, have BDE. Joe Hildebrand exudes Tiny Dick Energy. It's more infectious than Monkey Pox. Avoid Hildebrand unless you want it.
#ThisIsNotJournalism
#Hildebrandt
#Auspol

[Tony Abbott Unplugged @FakeTonyAbbott1]

@TimWilsonMP @AusFedPolice Did you get a visit from the #AFP after you soiled the APH #prayerroom?

[Tony Abbott Unplugged @FakeTonyAbbott1]

For what? He allegedly treated sex-workers and rent-boys with due deference in the #Prayerroom. Just ask that mincing poodle #Pyne

[Matt Zhou @ZhouMatt]

@patrickgowernz @SoTheyCan @smokeylemonnz Is Tim Wilson a fit and proper person?

[Tony Abbott Unplugged @FakeTonyAbbott1]

@TimWilsonMP Not one to judge you, mate, but in fairness to your constituents I hope you have yourself steam cleaned after your "Prayer Room" sessions before you go pressing the flesh in Goldstein.
#justsayin

[Tony Abbott Unplugged @FakeTonyAbbott1]

I can confirm Peta and I frequently reaffirmed our faith in the APH Prayer Room. Before it was desecrated by Tim Wilson and that mincing poodle Chris Pine.

[Daryl Maguire’s tractor @DarylTractor]

A reminder from Laura Tingle that Concetta Fierravanti-Wells also made one other useful contribution - to Niki Savva’s book:

“Rightly or wrongly, the perception is that you are sleeping with your chief of staff,” she told Tony Abbott re Peta Credlin affair rumours.

[Tony Abbott Unplugged @FakeTonyAbbott1]

@AlanTudgeMP There are rumours you are on the way out, Tudgeywudgey. And that you are a dud root.

[Tony Abbott Unplugged @FakeTonyAbbott1]

Is it just me or does everyone else yearn for that simpler time when that lazy incompetent fat prick @JoeHockey was Treasurer? The #DoltfromKooyong makes Hockey look like a Nobel Prize winning economist by comparison.
https://t.co/gIjXAqipRG

[Tony Abbott Unplugged @FakeTonyAbbott1]

What total bullshit! I deserved the Nobel prize for sayin Global Warming was total crap. And for discovering that C02 was invisible.

[BBC News (World) @BBCWorld]

Three scientists awarded 2021 Nobel Prize in Physics for work to help understand complex systems such as the Earth's climate https://t.co/bgG0taOWVY

[Tony Abbott Unplugged @FakeTonyAbbott1]

I'm rested and ready to shirt-front Xi Jinping. The PLA won't know what hit them.

[Ray Martin @Raymartin55]

China flys 56 military war planes in the vicinity of Taiwan in the last few days.

Tony Abbott, former PM of Australia flys to Taiwan.

What could possibly go wrong?

[Tony Abbott Unplugged @FakeTonyAbbott1]

Hi everyone! I'm back and available for preselection in #Willoughby

#AustraliaNeedsTony

#Auspol

[Tony Abbott Unplugged @FakeTonyAbbott1]

Yes. At least when I was PM we had a PM for wimmins and Australia was the envy of the feminist world.
#AustraliaNeedsTony
#FeelTheTone

[Tony Abbott Unplugged @FakeTonyAbbott1]

Victoria's Leadership challenge brings back so many memories! It's not that long ago I punched out that useless sack of condemned seal blubber @JoeHockey giving him two black eyes and inflicting brain damage. Who knew, eh? Good times!
#auspol

[Tony Abbott Unplugged @FakeTonyAbbott1]

Important we heard the woman's perspective from Port Adelaide.
#Kochie

[Jess Hill @jessradio]

There's quite a bit of *gut feeling* coming from David Koch on this panel. #WomensSafetySummit

[Tony Abbott Unplugged @FakeTonyAbbott1]

Brilliant idea, Peter. We could get them all on Zoom and mute them. I'll pass on the suggestion to #ScottyFromMarketing. He was planning on shooting them.

[Peter Fox 🦊 @Peter_Fox59]

National Summit on Women's Safety goes virtual, with government under pressure to address domestic violence problem - ABC News https://t.co/XlMJMLoivO

[Tony Abbott Unplugged @FakeTonyAbbott1]

We are working on legislation to give your husbands proxy votes, sweetie. Much safer for the country.

[Jess Rudd @Jess_Rudd]

He knows we vote, right? #WomensSafetySummit #keynote

[Tony Abbott Unplugged @FakeTonyAbbott1]

@larissawaters @OurWatchAus I made ironing affordable to all wimmin. What more do you want?

[Tony Abbott Unplugged @FakeTonyAbbott1]

Thats so true, sweetie. Wimmin have never had it so good in Australia since my Energy Policies made ironing virtually cost-free. No need to thank me, my life-long pension is thanks enough.

[Julia Em @66jayel]

Goodness, I wonder why.

As @ScottMorrisonMP himself pointed out, women didn't get shot while protesting.

What more could we want?

#auspol #EnoughIsEnough

[Tony Abbott Unplugged @FakeTonyAbbott1]

@janine_hendry @jackbollocks Its an outrage! I should have honoured the Wimmin of Australia by delivering that keynote address! No one has a greater lived experience of being PM for Wimmin than me.

[Tony Abbott Unplugged @FakeTonyAbbott1]

Great piece. We need strong women with enough money to leave the ironing alone for a time to protest, Lisa. You should also demand my reinstatement as PM (for Wimmins).

[Lisa Wilkinson @Lisa_Wilkinson]

After Brittany Higgins spoke up, Scott Morrison promised to embrace all 55 recommendations of the Respect@Work report on sexual harassment.

This week his government passed just 6.

The truth is, the PM has NO commitment to real change for women.

#auspol

[Tony Abbott Unplugged @FakeTonyAbbott1]

Not seeing your point, sweetie. I fixed your ironing problem, didn't I?

[Kristine Ziwica @KZiwica]

Is this what women marched for? In failing to adopt the Respect@Work sexual harassment recs, the Morrison government has well and truly nailed its colours to the mast of its intransigent, deeply sexist patriarchal ship. Me in ⁦@smh⁩ ⁦@theage⁩ https://t.co/0s6O1vPJeQ