Edward Sorin, C.S.C.

Son, in 207 years of religious study, I have only come up with two hard, incontrovertible facts: There is a God, and I'm pretty tight with Him.

[Edward Sorin, C.S.C. @FatherSorin]

The President said, "I may be Irish, but I'm not stupid." I challenge anyone who objects to this statement to visit a South Bend bar this evening.

[Edward Sorin, C.S.C. @FatherSorin]

@Kyle_Dorshorst Son, if you're run over by a leprechaun on St. Patrick's Day, you receive Sanctifying Grace and automatic forgiveness of all your sins.

[Edward Sorin, C.S.C. @FatherSorin]

@CDamianWrites If the flight attendant says "Evacuate" be sure to hear "Ite Missa Est"

[Edward Sorin, C.S.C. @FatherSorin]

@gardenoem Open fire in outdoor pit. Never fails to avoid mess.

[Edward Sorin, C.S.C. @FatherSorin]

@CDamianWrites Prayer... and Gin.

[Edward Sorin, C.S.C. @FatherSorin]

@wrdcsc Pardon me, I should have said לי חיים

[Edward Sorin, C.S.C. @FatherSorin]

@wrdcsc L'chaim

[Edward Sorin, C.S.C. @FatherSorin]

@stilllizkhalifa I once saw a professor running OUTOF of a classroom building with a bottle of Scotch.

[todd watkins @toddlerr]

tested positive see chart

[Edward Sorin, C.S.C. @FatherSorin]

@CDamianWrites It's not so much the bishops you need to fear - it's their winged monkeys.

[Edward Sorin, C.S.C. @FatherSorin]

This is the anniversary of Pope Francis' election. That explains why blood was running from my faucet and the squirrels arranged sticks into a pentagram on the lawn.

[Edward Sorin, C.S.C. @FatherSorin]

So...what are we going to replace the 4th quarter "1812 Overture" with?

[Edward Sorin, C.S.C. @FatherSorin]

@_aomalley Congratulations, son! Edit like a champion.

[Edward Sorin, C.S.C. @FatherSorin]

It's snow, people! It's not frogs falling from the sky or burning hail!

[Edward Sorin, C.S.C. @FatherSorin]

@randyjb22 Though one cries out, the Lord answers in a still, small voice. That may be difficult to hear, unless one listens. You are obviously tuning your ear to the Eternal Voice.

[Edward Sorin, C.S.C. @FatherSorin]

@wrdcsc @levistahl The most critical sentiment, and one that shall take you forward through life, is "Oh, well."

[Edward Sorin, C.S.C. @FatherSorin]

@profjasonruiz It is by Divine-Banana that one ascends to the Monkey Throne. The anointing with keepers'-milk must not be had before ritual is completed.

[Edward Sorin, C.S.C. @FatherSorin]

@AaronTaylorCFB Loyal Son, you worked for it, you earned it, you knew what it would mean to you, and now you have it. A tremendous blessing. Enjoy both now and for the rest of your life.

[Edward Sorin, C.S.C. @FatherSorin]

@TwoApostlesName I've never liked this candy, nor have I understood it. The pieces are so hard to peel.

[Edward Sorin, C.S.C. @FatherSorin]

@jdflynn He writes his "B" letters like a proper Beta. Perhaps he's destined to be a Greek scholar.