Fergal Gribben

Material Science techie dork. Yes, I'm a doctor, No, not that kind. Esme, Joshua & Benjamin my world, sleep deprivation now my thing.

[Stan Collymore @StanCollymore]

Suicide.

I'm choosing to be deliberately blunt and provocative in this post because it's necessary. Government, charities, football clubs are all pushing water up a hill in highlighting what is undoubtedly a major health crisis.

You take a rope.
You put it up in a garage or a tree nearby or far away.
You're thinking about every loved one you'll leave behind as you put that rope around your neck.
Then you drop.

Some are decapitated.
Some aren't.
All are found by someone who has a lifetime of trauma that will never leave them.
A son.
A daughter.
A brother.
A sister.
A mother.
A father.

I know 2 men who hung themselves.

One was found by his Mom.
One was found by his brother.
Neither have recovered fully. 20 and 30 years on.

A life sentence for people who were already worrying, terrified their loved one may do something.

So just visualise the above and ask, "is there another way"?

A segway for a moment.

I do a few Q&A's every year. Tales of yesterday with a 99% male audience of my age group.

After the stories and fun, my last question back to the audience is..

"Hands up if you struggle with a mental health issue".

Nobody ever puts a hand up. Despite 1 in every 3 of 500 attendees statistically struggling.

"Ah, nobody, that's fucking brilliant! Well I do! ". I then graphically tell people, stunned into silence about how a rope around my neck in the middle of nowhere jolted me to go home and cry like a baby to my Mom.

After the Q&A has finished, something always happens. I'll be chatting to a few guys, saying bye and one by one, men will come over and whisper " I struggle".

Or my mailbox the next day will have 30 emails from guys, their partners or kids saying " Dad/Uncle /Brother was there last night and what you said hit them hard".

And that's how some people realise that it's time to speak to a pal or family member or even rant to me in an email. It works, I often get a follow up email a year or 6 later saying that they took responsibility for their suicidal feelings and are now flying.

Humans are programmed to want to live, to have families and to keep the species growing and thriving. So for a human to want to short circuit that desire isn't normal, and it should never be spoken of as normal. It's the ultimate red flag.

If you suspect your mate, Dad, Brother, Uncle is struggling mentally, they deserve your intervention.

They deserve a " are you OK, please tell me what's up".

They deserve an opportunity to get past wanting to hang a rope over a tree or in a garage and slowly struggle until they die and you find them.

If you've been there and trust me I have plenty, then you'll know that text out of the blue, or a footie mate or one of your kids asking jow you are can open the curtains to some sunshine.

Because when suicide is your only answer, the room is already dark, and you can't see a way out.

So please, fucking pretty please, ask that husband, Dad, Uncle, Cousin, footie pal TODAY how they are.

You may be shocked what comes back but extremely glad that you asked.

For those who struggle, you're not alone.

[Fergal Gribben @FergalGribbben]

@theknightirish Jed says no!

[The Hollywood Reporter @THR]

“We are all connected in the great circle of life” - RIP James Earl Jones

[Fergal Gribben @FergalGribbben]

@theknightirish In the last 20 years, how many of these hiatuses have lasted more than a month?

[Fergal Gribben @FergalGribbben]

@ManUtd @CadburyUK 135

[Fergal Gribben @FergalGribbben]

@MatthewOToole2 Have you enjoyed the self inflating whoopie cushion though? Ours brought great delight all day.

[Fergal Gribben @FergalGribbben]

@aaronmac77 Lol you hate Tony

[Fergal Gribben @FergalGribbben]

@afneil @CouttsandCo M

[Fergal Gribben @FergalGribbben]

@MLAsAndTheLike 210ft is 426 pallets high. At an average weight of 15kg, thats 6.4 tonnes weighing down. That certainly exceeds the max recommended tolerance if correct

[Fergal Gribben @FergalGribbben]

@Paul_Doc84 🎣 🎣 🎣

[Fergal Gribben @FergalGribbben]

An absolute icon. A loss to the world 😞

[Pelé @Pele]

A inspiração e o amor marcaram a jornada de Rei Pelé, que faleceu no dia de hoje.

Amor, amor e amor, para sempre.
.
Inspiration and love marked the journey of King Pelé, who peacefully passed away today.

Love, love and love, forever.

[Fergal Gribben @FergalGribbben]

@BicyclemanJosh I'll show you a video someday of how I blew up a tank with a little too much of it #doh

[Fergal Gribben @FergalGribbben]

Amazing gesture from Stephen.

[Stephen Nolan @StephenNolan]

Meet Stephen - a dad, a husband, and an organ donating hero - @vinnybelfast followed his journey as he donated his kidney to a stranger

@BBCiPlayer | #NolanLIVE

[Fergal Gribben @FergalGribbben]

@AdamWagner1 But surely the 1922 committee could set a threshold for approving candidates so high that it weeds out some of the more colourful characters

[Fergal Gribben @FergalGribbben]

@Saraita101 The argument was made to me recently that it may not be intentional *rolling eyes* but this is just a way of keeping certain people out of these schools. It's a disgraceful snobbery induced indirect class barrier.

[Fergal Gribben @FergalGribbben]

@CollieZooks Yer famous Col!!!

[Fergal Gribben @FergalGribbben]

14 dead children. I cannot and will not ever understand the sheer willful ignorance of those who can't see that guns are the issue https://t.co/pDr3BYJPrF

[Fergal Gribben @FergalGribbben]

Shameless link to a free giveaway at my BIL new place. See this Instagram video by @enniskeenestate https://t.co/LpUiE6FZHy

[Fergal Gribben @FergalGribbben]

55% turnout at 9pm in this Lagan Valley polling station. Get out and vote, no matter which party you prefer #AE22 #preferablysomeoneprogressive