Fae

ADMIRE ME

[Fae @FleshOfFlower]

i did not think the TADC finale would crush me like this

[Fae @FleshOfFlower]

I know that "technically" it's mutton from a sheep and lamb from a lamb but nobody uses the word like that come on

[Fae @FleshOfFlower]

Call me lamb the way I age regress when slaughtered and turned into a slab of meat

[Fae @FleshOfFlower]

At the tarot lady's place getting my fortune read and she pulls two towers and the ace of clubs

Me: "hit"

Her: "how did you do that"

[Fae @FleshOfFlower]

@npdgoroakechi i wish i could retweet this

[Fae @FleshOfFlower]

@npdgoroakechi have you tried cutting :D
you're welcome btw :)))))))

[Fae @FleshOfFlower]

licking my local elderly population because I want a 70 year old husband that leaves me his inheritance when he has a heart attack from how good I am at making out

[Fae @FleshOfFlower]

licking my local elderly popularion to test how porous they are

[Fae @FleshOfFlower]

i don't think she'll like where we're going for our second date

[Fae @FleshOfFlower]

Just asked a girl if a cloud looked like a Burger King™ DOUBLE DELUXE WHOPPER now only $7.99 with two flame-grilled 100% beef patties, topped with creamy mayonnaise, iceberg lettuce, tomatoes, and toasted sesame seed BUN and she looked at me in disgust and asked if I was okay...

[Fae @FleshOfFlower]

@JoyoyeNolastnam I wouldn't expect you to understand the nuances of tender love between two girls anyway

[Fae @FleshOfFlower]

Lesbian praying mantises,
where we take turns
carefully
nibbling eachother's skull,
making sure we're gentle enough,
so we can finish with the other's
brain
in our mouths,
like a more self-inflicted, insectoid version of the lovers of Pompeii

[Fae @FleshOfFlower]

@NotDeRic3564 THAT WAS NOT SUPPOSED TO BE A COMPLIMENT

[Fae @FleshOfFlower]

Somebody described heroin as "warm honey being poured over your brain" and I immediately went "ah so it's like your hair getting brushed"

[Fae @FleshOfFlower]

The reason I tweet is because I wholeheartedly believe that the way I court my future wife is through her reading all my tweets and instantly falling in love with me

[Fae @FleshOfFlower]

Me to my cryptographically obsessed wife: "Hey sweetheart, I know you loveeee substitution ciphers, can you say that again but replace
H with L,
A with O,
and T with V?"

"I love you"

"Thanks babe, I love you too ❤️"

[Fae @FleshOfFlower]

@npdgoroakechi I appreciate you risking jailtime in order to comment this oomf

[Fae @FleshOfFlower]

age regressing into a kitty during ropeplay and tangling myself in a spool of yarn

[Fae @FleshOfFlower]

The worst thing about the disappearance of round incandescent lightbulbs isn't the loss of the warm yellow glow, or that my bedside lamp can't adjust brightness with other bulbs,
but the fact that I can no longer longingly stare at a bulb and want to get it stuck in my mouth

[Fae @FleshOfFlower]

I wanna grab handfuls of gravel while lying forward on my chest and flap my wings to simulate the lift of the wind beneath

This is what freedom is

[Fae @FleshOfFlower]

I think it would feel really good to live naked inside a gravel pit and then you can feel all the tiny individual stones cascade against your skin as you roll around and wiggle about like an igneous worm

Anyway how do you know I'm touch starved