FlyOnTheOfficeWall

This is what I have to put up with.

[FlyOnTheOfficeWall @FlyInTheOffice]

On international drug lords: Pablo Escobar? Is he the guy from Cumbria?

[FlyOnTheOfficeWall @FlyInTheOffice]

On world cuisine: Bella Italia, is that Italian food?

[FlyOnTheOfficeWall @FlyInTheOffice]

HR safety video misery morning...
“Someone could lose their life over something as simple as keeping your work environment clean and tidy”
Indeed they could, especially if I beat the filthy animals who are incapable of cleaning up after themselves to death with their own mess.

[FlyOnTheOfficeWall @FlyInTheOffice]

https://t.co/RNxIpwY3ae

[FlyOnTheOfficeWall @FlyInTheOffice]

Current mood

[FlyOnTheOfficeWall @FlyInTheOffice]

On world georgraphy: Isn’t Las Vegas it’s own country?

[FlyOnTheOfficeWall @FlyInTheOffice]

On revisiting children's entertainment: What's the dog in Scooby Doo called?

[FlyOnTheOfficeWall @FlyInTheOffice]

Jobs where you'd reasonably expect hypothermia to be an occupational hazard: Mountaineer, Polar Explorer, Ice Road trucker, one of those crab fisherman/woman from Deadliest Catch.
Jobs where you'd reasonably expect hypothermia to not be a concern: Office Monkey. But here we are.

[FlyOnTheOfficeWall @FlyInTheOffice]

On meteorological phenomena: I didn't know it was the wind that moved clouds

[FlyOnTheOfficeWall @FlyInTheOffice]

On being at the cutting edge of the marketing world: I don’t like people who use social pictures on LinkedIn

[FlyOnTheOfficeWall @FlyInTheOffice]

On working out product costs: Bruv! Maffs is dead

[FlyOnTheOfficeWall @FlyInTheOffice]

On allergens in the office: is a hazelnut a peanut?

[FlyOnTheOfficeWall @FlyInTheOffice]

On the wonders of nature:
Colleague 1 - Bruv!
Ducks don't float, they swim! Like humans!
Colleague 2 - What? No, they float...
Colleague 1 - So if you chopped their feet off they'd just float?
Colleague 3 - only one way to find out.

[FlyOnTheOfficeWall @FlyInTheOffice]

On workplace hygiene: I was in the loo drying my ring

[FlyOnTheOfficeWall @FlyInTheOffice]

On being a crucial cog in the corporate machine: I've been so busy I've not even been able to do my Words With Friends

[FlyOnTheOfficeWall @FlyInTheOffice]

On every day job challenges: "The hardest thing about this job is how to word things" It's all your job is, you're a copywriter in marketing

[FlyOnTheOfficeWall @FlyInTheOffice]

On post-holiday skincare: “don’t exfoliate your skin, that will get rid of your tan”
[well we are in Essex, the land of the fake tan. Sigh]

[FlyOnTheOfficeWall @FlyInTheOffice]

On The Joys of Parenthood: “Imagine if the baby got lost and came out of your bum”

[FlyOnTheOfficeWall @FlyInTheOffice]

On bags of ridged crisps:
Colleague1: “Ooo they’re ribbed!”
Colleague2: “for your pleasure”

[FlyOnTheOfficeWall @FlyInTheOffice]

On parking where you shouldn't: To be fair, I'm probably the most disabled person in this office