I told my therapist, "I feel safest when I do everything alone." She didn't even ask why. She just said:
"That's not independence. That's grief." And I swear, I felt something in me break open. Because it is grief, isn't it? Grief for every time you asked for help and no one showed up. Grief for being the child who had to hold it all together while everyone else fell apart. Grief for realizing, way too young, that no one was ever really coming to save you. You didn't choose to be strong you had to be. Because breaking wasn't safe. Crying didn't change anything. And needing people only led to disappointment, guilt, or punishment. So you grew up over-prepared. You move through life with backup plans for your backup plans. You, double check doors, messages, emotions-everything. You carry the weight of "I'll handle it" even when you're breaking inside. People call you "independent," but they don't see the version of you who secretly wants to collapse in someone's arms and actually be caught this time.
Someone posted Tyler in the pit when Bow Wow was performing and I just want to remind folks that what we are seeing is a true hip hop fan and student of the game. It makes me smile
Studying abroad in Greece and having to take your roommate to the ER for a broken arm and the nurses going omg I’m so sorry you’re not Greek so we have to charge you and it’ll be a bit expensive I’m so sorry!!! And it was $20 and only two hours of our life
Yes that’s why i never wanna hear that shit about “my grandma and grandad were together forever/marriages used to last” YEAH GRANNY WASNT ALLOWED TO HAVE A SAVINGS ACCOUNT OR GET AN APARTMENT ON HER OWN. SHE WAS A PRISNA!
One of these people is me 👩🏽🦱back when we had Black TV shows on air
I used to opine that all the Black comedy shows were segregated on one night,
but now there’s no nights & that sucks more 🫠