Sir Caps a Lot

[Sir Caps a Lot @FosterCaps]

Grandmother: (Shouting for no reason at all but so everyone can hear) Where’s your girlfriend?

Me: I don’t have one Gran.

Grandmother: Oh. (shaking her head in disapproval)

Laughter ensures. Happy Easter folks!

[Sir Caps a Lot @FosterCaps]

Sydney Sweeney do you like retarded 24 year olds with crippling gambling and nicotine addictions?

[icons in pop @iconsinpop]

sydney sweeney seemingly confirming that she’s single

[Sir Caps a Lot @FosterCaps]

11 more of these puppies and I’ll be barking tonight. #LANK

[Sir Caps a Lot @FosterCaps]

Blind taste testing. Liberals thought I wouldn’t get it right.

I nailed it. Domestics are flowing.

Boa.

[Sir Caps a Lot @FosterCaps]

Both sides of this picture are what make this country so great. #units #springbreakies #expand

[Sir Caps a Lot @FosterCaps]

No post-2000’s questions. Grannies win. #shrink

[Sir Caps a Lot @FosterCaps]

Time to beat the grannies in trivia

[Sir Caps a Lot @FosterCaps]

Time to beat the grannies in trivia

[Sir Caps a Lot @FosterCaps]

No comment at this time regarding Mr. Woods.

Heard Bonnie Blue is making a pit stop in Boca after Cancun though!

[Sir Caps a Lot @FosterCaps]

Spring break.

- Old fashioned (smoked)
- Domestics (flowing)
- Zyn (6mg, wintergreen, buzz is simply incredible)
- Smoke shows (will talk to zero)
- Depositing into Hard Rock betting (will win no money)
- Johnnie-O and Peter Millar all week (as alpha)

[Sir Caps a Lot @FosterCaps]

I am Tiger Woods. @PopstrokeGolf

[Sir Caps a Lot @FosterCaps]

Removing a picture of myself on the Hinge profile and replacing with this gem.

If I don’t have 30 new matches by the end of the day I’d be surprised.

Ball (remains) up top.

[Sir Caps a Lot @FosterCaps]

Domestics.
Keno.
College basketball bets.
How are you spending Thursday night?

Ball (remains) up top.

[Sir Caps a Lot @FosterCaps]

Ball no longer up top.

Taking ball home and punting it off the roof.

[Sir Caps a Lot @FosterCaps]

Hush up boa. Sattyday special tonight.

- Bet an O/U that lost by 87 points
- Screamed at by a homeless illegal (reported to ICE)
- Begged for a zyn from roommate (revoked, he had no flavored pouches)
- Had 4 girls give me the Heisman in one week (ball remains up top)

[Sir Caps a Lot @FosterCaps]

Do I even need a caption for this one?

You all know at this point…

[Sir Caps a Lot @FosterCaps]

Thoroughly disappointed in myself for not thinking of this idea last year.

[Sir Caps a Lot @FosterCaps]

Me tonight blacking out off IPAs and speaking to zero women

[Sir Caps a Lot @FosterCaps]

Friday activities include:

- Full bottle of wine ($7, Star Market)
- Redeemed crowns for a $0.20 parlay (it lost in the first leg)
- 3 dates set up for next 7 days (none of them will go anywhere)
- Watched 11 Surivor episodes (Lindsay from S3, sup)

Time for a shot.