FPL pessimistic potato

don’t really use this anymore because I think Elon Musk is a silly man and this bloody app has become a cesspool. still love starch and still hate really FPL

[FPL pessimistic potato @FplPotato]

If James fucking Justin gets another mother bastard CS and attacking return today I am literally gonna go and fckin glue all of the bread in my house to my body then go and lie down in the park and wait to get pecked to death because I cannot put up with this fucking game anymore

[Manchester United @ManUtd]

The wait is over.

[Fabrizio Romano @FabrizioRomano]

🚨💣 BREAKING: Bryan Mbeumo to Manchester United, here we go!

Green light from Brentford and club to club agreement reached for £70m package, as @TheAthleticFC reports.

Contract agreed weeks ago with Mbeumo as he only wanted Man United move.

After Cunha, Mbeumo next for #MUFC.

[TrophyFPL (Mo) 🏆 @TrophyFpl]

What an amazing day ❤️

The @fpl_juice charity match was such a success.

✅ Great competitive match
✅ Raised over 2k for charity
✅ Had a laugh with the FPL community
✅ Witnessed Ed’s moustache
✅ Oh, and won the bloody Trophy 🏆

[FPL pessimistic potato @FplPotato]

@PlanetFPLPod @FPL2Guys1Cup @fpl_juice @StreetChildUtd Nicely done Sham. Was never a pen though 😀

[Roberto Hollis (FPL Yellow Army) @RobertoHollis9]

My team @fpl_juice 😍

@fplblackbox_az @ECraigBurgess @FplDachshund @FPLFocal @FPL_Discomfort @FPLPlonker @fantasyfooty @FPL_Savage @TrophyFpl @FPL_BRUNO18 @FplPotato @FPLJim1 @FPL_Panda @FPLWittyName

[The JUiCE Show @thejuiceshowpod]

Last minute training round mine (according to @launchpodstudio 😂) today!

Team Nick aka JUiCE-ventus are ready to go!

Let’s have a look at the collection of absolute LEGENDS we’ve assembled…

@ECraigBurgess CDM/CM - A killer of a pass but could be killed from too much running. Wins his headers and attempts to get around the pitch as much as his lungs will allow… also was once on TV… for about 5 mins!

@FPLPlonker LB/CB
Playing style: Always injured
Personality: * Shouts in Essex *

@FPLFocal CM
Playstyle: Playmaker
Personality: Better at FPL than football

@fplblackbox_az RB
Throw in extraordinaire and has been promised the first penalty by Mo

@LazyFPL Position: CM
Playstyle: No known significant strengths
Personality: Caring

@FPL_Savage Positions: full back, winger, striker. Modern day full back where shooting and crossing is essential. Defending is optional. Speed so fast that it can mask a bad first touch, and a second one and a third one…

@jimdalycomedy aka @FPLJim1 Position: CM/RW/CB/RB
Style: Pass and (don't) move. Will attempt at least one rabona.

@FPL_Panda Position: GK / Auxiliary Striker
Playing style: Think Neville Southall combined with Josè Luis Chilavert.
Personality: Likes to shout at his defenders, opposition attackers and officials.

@FplDachshund Position: FWD/WF
Playing style: Always looking for the next pass. Tenacious and role model is James Milner

@Sergster9 Position: attacking midfielder/ striker. At younger age was fast, strong and used to kick a football well. Now only “kick a football” left.

@JamesDrewery CB / CM / FWD
Bambi on ice-man, the bigger they are the harder they stay on their feet. If he is not in the air, he's on the floor. Can unlease a powerful shot if his arms don't get in the way.

@FPL_Discomfort Oh and
Position: Set piece coach/ Retired goalkeeper/ utility lump/ long throw specialist
Style: Titus Bramble meets John Lydon. Technically awkward on the eye, but you can't look away. Crosses more boundaries than an elite 20/20 cricketer.

@FPL_BRUNO18 RW - Would have made it pro but for a dodgy hairline. Up the effin’ Juice 🧡 🍹

@BTSp0d Corrie: ST/W/CAM/CM
Mr Chocolate Power Enegry, the towering sensation. When on form he doesn’t play football, he dances football.

@FplPotato GK (with a glistening record of 1 goal from 1 appearance as a fwd in Sunday League this season)
Playing style: Think David de Gea but with a more annoying haircut.

@fantasyfooty LW but people think he’s RW 😉 Only player on the team that can play in boat shoes. Mind games extraordinaire.

@FPLWittyName CAM/CM/LB/RB equally talented in many positions and also doubling up as our (potentially very busy) physio 🤕

@TrophyFpl Manager: tactical genius and may make a 5 minute cameo to tear shit up if necessary

@fpl_juice Nick: CEO in very much a Mike Ashley mould 🍻. The old man of the squad, like Modric but with maybe 10 minutes in the tank.

Can’t wait to see everyone tomorrow. Whatever the result, charity is always the winner. Please donate if you are able to: https://t.co/H8vThVj7lC

Big love 🧡

[FPL pessimistic potato @FplPotato]

Give this some love - a great event for a great cause organised by some great lads

[The JUiCE Show @thejuiceshowpod]

It’s almost time and the donations are still coming in!

Thank you everyone for your generosity 🙏🏽

We’re within touching distance of £2,000 now and every penny counts. Please support if you can ❤️

#FPLCommunity @StreetChildUtd

https://t.co/k2662fHmEG

[The JUiCE Show @thejuiceshowpod]

Ash v Nick #FPLCommunity Charity Match!

Raising money for @StreetChildUtd

Donate here: https://t.co/ItocE3ZqdG

Date: Saturday 7th June
Venue: The Hive, Camrose Ave, London, HA8 6AG
Arrive: 12pm
Kick Off: 1pm
Event Finish: 3pm

11-a-Side - Bonus Chips - Live Streamed - Mic'd Up Players - Cam Wearing Players - Awards Ceremony + Loads more!

Some in attendance include: @FPLFocal @Pras_fpl @FPL_Eire @TrophyFpl @fplgraduates @FPLFella @fantasyfooty @FPLFanShow @FPLJim1 @FPLMeerkat @ManOnPod_Craig @DanDave1989 @fplblackbox_az @FPLPlonker + Loads more incredible content creators and members of the community! 🔥 🔥 🔥

Hosted by @launchpodstudio in association with @FFScout 🌟

[FPL pessimistic potato @FplPotato]

@PlanetFPLPod Ipswich beat Manchester United home and away

Although I’m probably not the only person who thinks that will happen

[FPL pessimistic potato @FplPotato]

Privileged to witness the Aurora Boreanaz from the tranquility of my back garden last night. Beautiful stuff x

[FPL pessimistic potato @FplPotato]

@OfficialFPL The replies on these tweets are always very odd

[FPL pessimistic potato @FplPotato]

@FPLProp Wait til this guy discovers fire, it’s gonna blow his mind

[FPL pessimistic potato @FplPotato]

My nan when she’s planning to spend the weekend pelting rocks at passers by

[Simon Bajkowski @spbajko]

Walker and Stones out for Sunday

[FPL pessimistic potato @FplPotato]

@OfficialFPL So it’s FPL minus anything that makes it challenging

I have literally never been more depressed about this game

[FPL pessimistic potato @FplPotato]

@FplMode Wow that’s pretty impressive, I can only get one or sometimes two people in mine

[Manchester United @ManUtd]

So, so deserved.

Kobbie Mainoo has received his first call-up to the @England senior squad 👏🏴󠁧󠁢󠁥󠁮󠁧󠁿

#MUFC || #ThreeLions

[FPL pessimistic potato @FplPotato]

@fplblackbox_az Do you actually need a keeper for this? If so, allow me to introduce… me

DM me if you still need someone

[Bruno Fernandes @B_Fernandes8]

What a special afternoon for all of us 🙌🏼

[FPL pessimistic potato @FplPotato]

Why is no one considering Maddison?

[Republic of Kiribati @KiribatiGov]

Fine. You're not invited