michael

aerospace engineer | dog and cat dad | chicken mom | god's filthiest commie | 31

[michael @FreesideMike]

Chicks always dig the beard 🐥

[Vivian @suchnerve]

Men yearn for praise

[michael @FreesideMike]

id mow your lawn in every life

[clay ⛷️ @hanfjob]

I know the Bud Light but I fuck with it heavy

[michael @FreesideMike]

@Nocturnal @Gabbrielxzn wouldn't wish it on your worst enemy but wish it on your wife 😭

[michael @FreesideMike]

I hate when people say they don't order fries because it's empty calories. sybau and eat your vegetables

[Steven @StevenWallaby]

this might be the shot of the decade

[𝐋𝐞𝐠𝐞𝐧𝐝 @Be_like_legend]

its crazy how if you get good grades they just let you raw dog adhd your whole life

[michael @FreesideMike]

need

[love drops @lovedropx]

Fuck parties man I just wanna drive to the lake and look up at the stars with someone I love

[michael @FreesideMike]

Butters Stotch is my spirit animal

[elle ⋆ ˚｡⋆୨୧˚ @pookiechae]

women with big boobs are always right

[Michael Scimbobulous, CFA @ScrimboSaggins]

A man cannot shit in the same pants twice… for they are not the same pants and he is not the same man

[Michael Scimbobulous, CFA @ScrimboSaggins]

A man cannot shit in the same pants twice… for they are not the same pants and he is not the same man

[kiki☆ @iwannaeaturmind]

slow sex with lots of kissing

[remx @biigrem]

So if you can buy US citizenship for 5 mill can I sell mine for 5 mill and get the fck out of here?

[m @sus2chainz]

life is so boring when u don’t have a crush on someone

[michael @FreesideMike]

330 pm coffee please save me 😔

[michael @FreesideMike]

@penandjen can I at least take my contacts out first?