Ryan's Fiction

I hope I die before I get old

[Ryan's Fiction @FreshClemonade]

Does this pinned tweet make me look fat?

[Ryan's Fiction @FreshClemonade]

I'd pay good money for a soft drinks bottle with a removable lid

[Ryan's Fiction @FreshClemonade]

If you're paying £5.80 for a pint you should be allowed to do a little minesweeping

[Ryan's Fiction @FreshClemonade]

Despite my efforts the plumber didn't want to 'come to some other kind of arrangement'

[Ryan's Fiction @FreshClemonade]

In the alternate ending of Jason and the Argonauts Jason is thrown over board for saying "The guys back home Argonaut going to believe this!"

The end.

[maximus〽️ @Maxthepapi]

My elbow watching me do a full skin care routine on my face.

[Taylor Kennedy @marioboy261]

Here's a never before seen outtake from Bear in the Big Blue House.

[Ryan's Fiction @FreshClemonade]

Finally get a bank holiday off and everything on telly is shit

[joe heenan @joeheenan]

That's the bunting up!

[Ryan's Fiction @FreshClemonade]

GAMESHOBIA
The fear of telling people what I like to do in my spare time on national television.

[nico @byeenicoo]

“you’ll miss high school when you’re an adult” no i actually dont at all

[Ryan's Fiction @FreshClemonade]

The most unrealistic thing in Harry Potter is how he's meant to be from London but never refers to urinating as "going for a Tommy Riddle"

[Ryan's Fiction @FreshClemonade]

Faith is opening an email titled "Price changes" and hoping it might decrease

[Ryan's Fiction @FreshClemonade]

Cocknies love telling people they didn't know if they were coming or going

[Jon @jturnerdds]

I’m a dentist and I graduated with 68 other ones. I’ve met even more in 13 years as a dentist. None of us have been asked shit about our opinions on toothpastes.

[Eden Dranger @Eden_Eats]

Hear me out:
A separate line at coffee shops for people who know exactly what they want.

[Kick Push Kgosi @MrSkinnyGenes]

If Will Smith hadn’t slapped Chris Rock I wouldn’t have known the Oscars even happened

[Ryan's Fiction @FreshClemonade]

*puts the cat amongst the pigeons* what the fuck

[Ryan's Fiction @FreshClemonade]

Please don't look at me as I retreat into my shell of angst now that you can like Instagram stories

[Ryan's Fiction @FreshClemonade]

When love in fact DOES have something to do with it

[Ryan's Fiction @FreshClemonade]

On this day 12 years ago someone somewhere got Rick Roll'd