Dan Carlson

[Dan Carlson @FuckinDanimal]

The best thing @Budweiser has come out with is drinking water in a can. That way when I pour it out my plants don't die.

[Dan Carlson @FuckinDanimal]

kinda bored and waiting on laundry. So it Archer time on Netflix.

[Dan Carlson @FuckinDanimal]

was awake for 22 hours, then slept for 21 then awake for 7 and took a 3 hour nap. What the fuck is wrong with me?

[Dan Carlson @FuckinDanimal]

ah shit, forgot I had one of these accounts again. Being that I sit in my cab 12 hr a day, maybe I should get the app on my phone.

[Dan Carlson @FuckinDanimal]

Saw a drunk dude handcuffed on the ground trying to tell MCSO he wasn't tryin to pee in public while his pants were still
around his ankels

[Dan Carlson @FuckinDanimal]

holy shit, I forgot I had one of these for a minute...or a few months...

[Dan Carlson @FuckinDanimal]

off to work again. work 32 hours then take 24 off, then probably work 16 hours a day for the next week and a half again. It's getting lame.

[Dan Carlson @FuckinDanimal]

Waiting for calls at work. Super lame.

[Dan Carlson @FuckinDanimal]

I love the fact that other animals roam this planet just so I can eat them. http://t.co/8QOxI6tm

[Dan Carlson @FuckinDanimal]

@amiamiley Were you in Old Town Scottsdale this weekend? Or do you have doppelgängers partying all over the Valley of the Sun for you?

[Dan Carlson @FuckinDanimal]

Went drinkin at a bar in North Phoenix, ended up drinking mostly Colorado and San Diego beer...$15 never got me so fucked up.

[Dan Carlson @FuckinDanimal]

@JamesDeen I'd totally hook you up with some Foodbertos, if you weren't 6 hours away man.

[Dan Carlson @FuckinDanimal]

About to drive drunk people for 12 hours. But first I'm grillin the shit out of this chicken breast and sauteing some mother fucking onions

[Dan Carlson @FuckinDanimal]

Bad ass socks!@KristinaRosexxx (re: http://t.co/ioBtME4q)

[Dan Carlson @FuckinDanimal]

Home...Great Mountains of the World: Mt. Rainier http://t.co/6DNs3mj6

[Dan Carlson @FuckinDanimal]

Man, 1 more hour to make more money, two more hours to work. Then 16 more hours off working and a day off...can't wait.

[Dan Carlson @FuckinDanimal]

Man, dropped off the hottest Russian chick to the airport this morning. She said she's got 22 hours of flying, not including lay overs.

[Dan Carlson @FuckinDanimal]

Man, that Stone IPA soaked steak was just what I needed this morning w/ my scrambled eggs. Now off to get pierced and drive a cab for 12hrs

[Dan Carlson @FuckinDanimal]

The last chick in my cab smelled so fucking amazing....it made me really hungry.