Uncle Jesse

*This is a parody account and is not affiliated with John Stamos or Full House.* we talk about poon and sports. contact: [email protected]

[Uncle Jesse @FullhouseJesse]

My dick is like a Nintendo 64. Blow on it to get it started and can satisfy 4 people at a time.

[Cody @CKicks0]

"What does attainment mean?" 😂 #JuliusRandle #Kentucky #Education https://t.co/UCD4XV6nYx

[Uncle Jesse @FullhouseJesse]

RT if you don't have an STD

[Uncle Jesse @FullhouseJesse]

I love yoga pants season.

[Uncle Jesse @FullhouseJesse]

Uncle Jesse snapchats: Guaranteeing sub-10 second orgasms since 2012.

[Uncle Jesse @FullhouseJesse]

@SicilianInHeels get in line.

[Uncle Jesse @FullhouseJesse]

I'm not saying I did rawdog Kimmy Gibbler, but I'm not saying I didn't.

[Chrisinmichigan @chris_keast]

@FullhouseJesse the original wrecking ball

[Uncle Jesse @FullhouseJesse]

March Madness is when Uncle Jesse comes out of his winter hibernation & starts giving the meat hammer to some tuna canoes on Spring Break.

[Uncle Jesse @FullhouseJesse]

You can hate me if you want but I still made you cum.

[Uncle Jesse @FullhouseJesse]

I like my women like I like my whiskey..

12 years old and mixed up with coke.

[Uncle Jesse @FullhouseJesse]

I like my women like I like my TV..

Thin, highly defined, and flat against my bedroom wall.

[Uncle Jesse @FullhouseJesse]

Beyoncé surfboarded me first

[Uncle Jesse @FullhouseJesse]

The vagina is my 3rd favorite hole

[Uncle Jesse @FullhouseJesse]

If having threesomes with twins half my age is wrong, then I don't want to be right.

[Uncle Jesse @FullhouseJesse]

The Sharkeisha sucker punch was over me.

[Uncle Jesse @FullhouseJesse]

Say something I'm cumming inside you

[Uncle Jesse @FullhouseJesse]

Virgins are useless

[Uncle Jesse @FullhouseJesse]

@ValentinBibble Bend over and I'll show ya

[Uncle Jesse @FullhouseJesse]

Even Kendrick Lamar want this dick