Patty Mayonnaise

probably cold, a ghost? pronouns: she/her

[Patty Mayonnaise @GGinyourpocket]

DOUG!

[Seattle Mariners @Mariners]

🛒 REPOST TO WIN 🛒

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[Acyn @Acyn]

Trump: You have to get out and vote. You won’t have to do it anymore. Four years, it will be fixed, it will be fine. You won’t have to vote anymore.. In four years, you won’t have to vote again.

[Patty Mayonnaise @GGinyourpocket]

@ShelbytheFairy You are right. It was great and you were great and you give the most thoughtful gifts and nothing you did could have led to any harsh judgement because your authentic fun self is really enjoyable to be around. You are enough and there’s nothing to compensate for OKAY SHELBY BRAIN

[Patty Mayonnaise @GGinyourpocket]

I like all my selfies w my partner and I don’t like a lot of selfies I take so I feel like this is a good sign

[Patty Mayonnaise @GGinyourpocket]

If I was a singer and someone threw their phone at me on stage I would kick it back stage to have my security grab and simply never give it back and probably throw it off a bridge or something

[Patty Mayonnaise @GGinyourpocket]

I order groceries from Albertsons and I’m such a regular the manager texts me directly now 😎😎😎 and I feel cool

[Patty Mayonnaise @GGinyourpocket]

Half of me is the gasoline but the other Half’s the surf

[Patty Mayonnaise @GGinyourpocket]

Ever since Oregon DMV got hacked I’ve gotten way more spam shit. Almost clicked on this link today. Gotta be smarter than the hackerz

[Patty Mayonnaise @GGinyourpocket]

Who’s son texted me this and I don’t even have the number saved 😂

[Patty Mayonnaise @GGinyourpocket]

People that live in Tucson should NOT own husky dogs :(

[Patty Mayonnaise @GGinyourpocket]

My mom got high and said she’d watch the Kardashians with me and then did not stop ranking on it the entire episode

[Patty Mayonnaise @GGinyourpocket]

@Dave_253_ I like that one the most cuz I think it tastes like pickles

[Patty Mayonnaise @GGinyourpocket]

I stuck a q tip too far into my ear yesterday and my ear hurts still I’m frightened

[Seattle Mariners @Mariners]

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[Patty Mayonnaise @GGinyourpocket]

Damn he was the cutest pitcher too 😢

[MLB @MLB]

Mariners announce LHP Robbie Ray will undergo surgery to repair his flexor tendon and miss the remainder of the 2023 season.

[Seattle Mariners @Mariners]

🛫 RETWEET TO WIN 🛬

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[Patty Mayonnaise @GGinyourpocket]

People rlly be good at remembering their pets bdays/adoption days. All I know is I have a cat and I’ve been saying she’s “around 5” for a while now