Gabrielle Alger

[Gabrielle Alger @Gabrielle_denae]

@DermotKennedy Vegas!!!

[Gabrielle Alger @Gabrielle_denae]

@samisun23 You have a vote in me

[Steve @thahumorguy]

Me after someone buys the house i had saved on Zillow, that I was gonna buy in 10 years..

[Brent Toderian @BrentToderian]

“In Finland, the # of homeless people has fallen sharply. Those affected receive a small apartment & counselling with no preconditions. 4 out of 5 people affected make their way back into a stable life. And all this is CHEAPER than accepting homelessness.” https://t.co/EH3reri9lz

[maybe: clare @clur19]

me freaking out and hiding when the maintenance guys knock on my apartment door even though I was the one who asked them to come fix something

[Sarcastic Mommy @sarcasticmommy4]

Marriage is between two people: one person who is on the verge of sleep and one person who is asking if the front door is locked.

[trash jones @jzux]

what’s the opposite of the zoomies. that’s what i have

[Jack Corbett @jackcorrbit]

God, grant me the serenity to accept the things I cannot change (bad posture)

[Fredo @FredoInDaCut995]

Boyfriend that drives 🤝 Girlfriend that sits pretty and gives bad directions

[T @tylerthecreator]

how you raw dog life with no interest or hobbies just waking up and sending emails ahaha

[morgan sung @morgan_sung]

she's a 10 but she gets overstimulated at the supermarket

[Nicholas Ferroni @NicholasFerroni]

If you are okay with having Muslim, Jewish and Hindu students sit through a Christian prayer in public school, and not okay with having Christian students sit through a Muslim, Jewish or Hindu prayer, then it’s NOT religious freedom- it’s religious oppression.

[1984’s George Whorewell @EwdatsGROSS]

Me working

[Robert Reich @RBReich]

5 of the 6 Supreme Court justices who just voted to overturn Roe were nominated by a Republican president who lost the popular vote.

This is how democracy dies.

[Cher @cher]

If Every time Men Had Sex,
They Risked Death, Physical Disability,A Life Altering Interruption In Their Education,Or Career, & The Sudden Life Long
Responsibility For Another
Human Being,I Think
They’d Expect A Choice
In The Matter

[Gabrielle Alger @Gabrielle_denae]

@decmbrsveryown I always wonder if they ever look me up anything bahahah

[Lakota Man @LakotaMan1]

When I was in the Army, the entire base went on lockdown because someone misplaced an M-16. Even the military knows assault rifles belong only on the battlefield — because they’re weapons of war.

[shelby wolstein @ShelbyWolstein]

i dont simply go through airport security. i have a goal. i want everyone in line to be blown away by my efficiency. i want to be celebrated as i push my belongings across the table. i want TSA to offer me a job (i’ll decline). i want people talking about me at their gate. glory.

[erin @__erinblake]

aw that sounds so fun i would love to come! but unfortunately i have crippling social anxiety. and also i’m afraid to drive on the freeway