Shaylee Stapleton

[Shaylee Stapleton @GangstaShaysta3]

How long can I rewatch new girl before getting bangs???

[Shaylee Stapleton @GangstaShaysta3]

@staple_tits hello I miss you

[🍯belly furtado🍯 @staple_tits]

Whoops!!!! Almost tweeted something self-deprecating again!!!

[Shaylee Stapleton @GangstaShaysta3]

Update: I did a head stand and my sweat was so salty my eyes were on fire

[Shaylee Stapleton @GangstaShaysta3]

I ate at the Chinese buffet an hour before hot yoga. I’m asking for your thoughts and prayers. 🙏

[Shaylee Stapleton @GangstaShaysta3]

I just accidentally shaved off half of my eyebrow. Merry Christmas to me

[Shaylee Stapleton @GangstaShaysta3]

I slowed down on going to coffee shops and I’m still broke wtf

[Shaylee Stapleton @GangstaShaysta3]

I stole two shrimps from the Chinese buffet last night for my dogs and forgot about it. I’m now checking out at a Krispy Kreme reeking of dead crustaceans.

[Shaylee Stapleton @GangstaShaysta3]

2021 had to go out with a bang, taking my girl Betty White with it 😩

[Shaylee Stapleton @GangstaShaysta3]

Watching a documentary on Meth and pausing every 5 minutes to listen to my meth head neighbors yelling. Is this central Illinois take on an immersive experience?

[The Hoarse Whisperer @TheRealHoarse]

Overheard a conservative attorney pivot directly from complaining about COVID restrictions to complaining about how long he waited in the ER yesterday to get a broken foot looked at… because it was full of COVID patients.

[chloe 🕷 @lil_ibuprofen_]

vaccinated or not please stop standing so close to me in line

[Rachel @femaleredhead]

motion sickness is so embarrassing. like oh no the car is moving why don’t i throw up about it

[bobby wasabi @bobbyteriyaki]

whoever turned ADHD into a quirky personality trait will answer to god

[Shaylee Stapleton @GangstaShaysta3]

I swear to God every time I get bit by a spider I get bit 5,000x and they swell so big it's embarrassing. Brb omw to get some topical ointment

[Shaylee Stapleton @GangstaShaysta3]

Apparently this was so loud it rattled people's windows and I didn't even hear it. BRB getting my hearing checked 😅

[Springfield Leaks @SpringfieldLeak]

We are looking into the loud boom. The City told us they do not believe it was here locally. They believe it came from an outside or surrounding community but have not confirmed exact location/community. Local PD has not been dispatched in any area here regarding the loud boom.

[Shaylee Stapleton @GangstaShaysta3]

Glitter is the lice of the art world