Garrett VS

Life’s better outside

[Curiosity @CuriosityonX]

fun fact nobody asked for: at 11:15 UTC today the sun shines on 99% of the world's population simultaneously. 8 billion people, one sunbeam. anyway good morning

[Ivy⸆⸉ @idkwahatimdoing]

This might be shot of the century

[sean @_sn_n]

no one:

the constitution:

[Lisa @lisathebeauty1]

one day you wake up and just stop wearing your Apple Watch.

[NOBUNAGA🇯🇵🏯_夏樹蒼依 @japan_nobunaga]

USA. A Mexican restaurant. We had not yet ordered anything, and the food was already arriving.

Chips. Salsa. Unrequested. Free.

I stopped the waiter. "We have not earned these."

"They just come with the table, man."

They come with the TABLE. In my land, hospitality is a debt. Every gift creates an obligation, weighed carefully, returned in the proper season with interest of feeling. Here, the gift arrives before you have even proven you can pay for dinner.

This is not an appetizer. This is a declaration: we trust you. Eat.

I ate with the gravity the moment deserved. And then — I must report this calmly — the basket emptied, and a new one appeared.

"Did we…?"

"Refill," the waiter said. "It's bottomless."

Bottomless. They have wells of salsa. The supply lines of this nation are beyond anything my ancestors imagined.

My friend warned me. "Don't fill up on chips, dude."

Too late. I had accepted three baskets. Honor demanded each one be finished — an unfinished gift is an insult. By the time my actual food arrived, I was a ruined man.

I was not hungry. I was not comfortable. I had been defeated by a courtesy.

Generosity that arrives before the request cannot be repaid. It can only be survived.

I know the rule now. I have made my peace with the basket. One basket. Two at the most.

Who am I deceiving. There is no number of baskets I would refuse. The trust of a nation is in that salsa, and I intend to honor all of it.

[Falcon 💷 @Falcon0nX]

When you realize you’re the exit liquidity for an unprofitable $2T company

[Jake @jacobkleinman]

“My Mayor is Muslim, my bagel is Jewish, my Christian’s Dior… Knicks in 4”
— unknown poet, early 21st century, the American Northeast

[JerryRigEverything @ZacksJerryRig]

The richest guy on the planet is about to rob your 401K. 👍

[unusual_whales @unusual_whales]

81% of young Americans say economic conditions are bad or terrible, per the Hill

[SwagKirb @Swag_K1RBY]

All Spirit Airlines Planes at 3:01 am:

[✨☁️🎀 𝓮𝓶𝓶𝓪 🎀☁️✨ @emmamurabito]

somewhere out there there’s a dude who makes $20k a year who’s mad about this

[Jackson Doud @JacksonDoud]

Dude behind me at lunch ordered “The usual.”

Got hit back with a “and that would be?”

Has to be absolutely devastating. Can’t even imagine.

[Jon Lovett @jonlovett]

In a surprise twist, the Epstein files released the attorney general.

[skooks @skooookum]

They think you’re this stupid

[Nostalgia @nostalgiaa]

The whole episode was actual ragebait

[Soleil @soleiljolina]

When I talk about the weather it isn’t small talk. I actually care about it and I want to discuss

[2001 Live @25YearsAgoLive]

Children’s author Mary Pope Osborne releases the 23rd book in her bestselling Magic Tree House series, Twister on Tuesday, whose plot regards characters Jack and Annie facing a tornado on the Midwestern prairie in the 1870s.

[james hawkins @james406]

110-year-old Turkish grandma shares her secret to a long life:

"i never once used Microsoft Teams"

[Buck @BuckOnTwidder]

overheard on the train this morning:

"i think that guys listening to our conversation”

[throwbacks @solelynostalgia]

21 years ago today, the first episode of ‘the suite life of zack & cody’ premiered on disney channel