General Whizzy

[General Whizzy @General_whizzy]

@SamePlot Naturally how jt should be in Naija😂😂 coz love scarce for this side😂😂

[Theo @SamePlot]

heartbreak should be 48 hours max. cry, eat, sleep it off and get tf out my chest.

[General Whizzy @General_whizzy]

@SamePlot Use your time well😂😂😂

[Theo @SamePlot]

**Cabin Crew:** Captain... the flight attendant you've been chatting with and promising layover dinners is my girlfriend.

**Pilot:** Which one?

**Cabin Crew:** Jessica.

**Pilot:** Ah. Okay.

**Cabin Crew:** If you take her from me, this aircraft won't be big enough for both of us.

**Pilot:** I'm booking the crew hotel now. Want a suite too?

**Cabin Crew:** Sir... it's not that I'm choosing a hotel upgrade over my relationship.

**Cabin Crew:** But since you're offering...

**Pilot:** Done.

**Cabin Crew:** While we're here, my cousin wants to get into aviation.

**Pilot:** Send his résumé.

**Cabin Crew:** And next month's roster?

**Pilot:** Already changed.

**Cabin Crew:** Captain... are you always this helpful?

**Pilot:** Son, if she leaves you for me, you're gonna need the suite, the job contact, *and* the better roster.

**Pilot:** I'm just planning ahead.

[General Whizzy @General_whizzy]

@SamePlot As i dey save my money, na so the money dey save me the following day abeg

[Theo @SamePlot]

Trying to start saving money but I'm confused…

am I just supposed to have money

and not spend it?

that's so hard 😭

[Theo @SamePlot]

"out of office until further notice" - my tombstone

[General Whizzy @General_whizzy]

@SamePlot @ysuckme The life e no balance

[Theo @SamePlot]

@ysuckme The same person who's "too busy" for you is planning surprises for someone else.

Priorities!

[General Whizzy @General_whizzy]

@SamePlot Very true

[Theo @SamePlot]

Every hommie has your number for their 3 a.m. breakdowns.

You have no one when it’s your turn.

You keep every sinking ship afloat while quietly drowning in silence.

Nobody notices until you go under.

[General Whizzy @General_whizzy]

@SamePlot Melo melo, melo melo lafe wi!!!!

[Theo @SamePlot]

He has been trading crypto for 5 years, his younger sister asked him "If you are always buying the dip, why are you still in the dip?" 😭

[General Whizzy @General_whizzy]

@SamePlot Omo the trips🥶🥶😂

[Theo @SamePlot]

Feeling sleepy is way sweeter than actually sleeping 😭

[General Whizzy @General_whizzy]

@SamePlot Bro went to sanctify it first

[Theo @SamePlot]

Ferrari built their first ever electric supercar oooo

Instead of unveiling it to the world first, they took it straight up to the pope 😭

The pope inspected it. Sat in the driver’s seat. Got the controls explained to him.

Before customers. Before deliveries. Before the streets.

God saw it first 👀

[General Whizzy @General_whizzy]

@SamePlot Amadioha would pay them a visit insha allah.. Amin Jesu Kristi🙏🏾

[Theo @SamePlot]

somewhere someone is telling a story about you and in their version, they’re right

[General Whizzy @General_whizzy]

@SamePlot You never ready