Andrea Schmidt

Just your local Chaotic Good CMYWTC (Cat Mom You Wish To Court)

[Andrea Schmidt @GigglesNSchmidt]

Have you ever cackled like a witch in your own home? While eating a snickers, cozy on a pink bean bag chair, playing your favorite video game?

[Andrea Schmidt @GigglesNSchmidt]

He belonged 2 doors down.

[Andrea Schmidt @GigglesNSchmidt]

My sister is coming over. I text, “I’m jumping in the shower, let yourself in”. Doorbell rings as I’m getting out, I’m mad, she didn’t follow instructions, I scream “IM COMING” and rip the door open, in just my towel. There is now a Stanley Steamer guy with a story to tell. ☠️

[Andrea Schmidt @GigglesNSchmidt]

The only way I can describe ovulating, is that I feel OVERWHELMINGLY…..carnivorous.

[Andrea Schmidt @GigglesNSchmidt]

@shanhansen 💯💯💯

[Andrea Schmidt @GigglesNSchmidt]

You have tasted fear until you’ve taken contacts out with stiletto nails.

[Andrea Schmidt @GigglesNSchmidt]

I don’t want to be productive. I want to be abducted.

[Shannon Hansen @shanhansen]

Is it me or is being good at foosball the sluttiest thing a man can be?

[Andrea Schmidt @GigglesNSchmidt]

Nothing makes you question your sanity like waking up at 4am to a beeping fire alarm and an upside down earwig
having a stand off on your ceiling.

[Andrea Schmidt @GigglesNSchmidt]

Later, while watching Cinderella 2:

Cinderella: I’m wearing a disguise so I won’t be recognized at the market

@shanhansen : Um, your face is showing

[Shannon Hansen @shanhansen]

Cinderella Triology night w/ @GigglesNSchmidt

Prince hasn’t said a word. She says,

“That’s how I like my men. Tall, dark and silent.”

[Shannon Hansen @shanhansen]

Cinderella Triology night w/ @GigglesNSchmidt

Prince hasn’t said a word. She says,

“That’s how I like my men. Tall, dark and silent.”

[meatball times @meatballtimes]

I've been feeling very under-nourished in my male friendships recently

I think there is something just kind of wrong with the default mode of male socialization/communication, something men aren't taught about relating to people

for instance --

[Andrea Schmidt @GigglesNSchmidt]

There’s nothing like feeling safe being your most ridiculous self with another human 💖

[Shannon Hansen @shanhansen]

HIGHLY recommend couch karaoke with your bestie. @GigglesNSchmidt

[Andrea Schmidt @GigglesNSchmidt]

@JaseRuggy I can’t look pastor melons.

[Andrea Schmidt @GigglesNSchmidt]

@JaseRuggy Nah. Just had a glass of wine 🤷🏼‍♀️

[Andrea Schmidt @GigglesNSchmidt]

Sure, you’ve had peanut butter and raisins on celery…. But what about peanut butter and prunes!? 😏

Did I mention I’m 34?

…and single?

[Andrea Schmidt @GigglesNSchmidt]

LOVED working in this one!!! 🤩😍🥰

[Rhonda Parrish @RhondaParrish]

I am so excited to share the results of my latest @OBPmusical commission!

With lyrics by @GigglesNSchmidt and music by @theDNGNmaestro this song with haunt your thoughts and linger in your head like the best kind of earworm.

Please give it a listen - https://t.co/0VaLFcg4Sl

[Andrea Schmidt @GigglesNSchmidt]

@JaseRuggy My vote is game shows with guns. (Price is Right, Jeopardy… etc.)

[Andrea Schmidt @GigglesNSchmidt]

@johnebosworth 🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣

[Andrea Schmidt @GigglesNSchmidt]

If I walk in the bathroom and you’re sitting silently in a stall…please, don’t rush that poop, don’t quickly grab toilet paper, there’s no need to flush… take your moment… you don’t have to prove anything to me girl.

[Andrea Schmidt @GigglesNSchmidt]

Me realizing “Californication” isn’t “acclimation to the California way of life” but something far more nefarious…