Griffin Handley

As a “Tremendous Idiot”, I “Fail Harder” at parenting every day in the best “Post Apostlyptic” way. More books to come.

[Griffin Handley @GriffinHandley]

Does anyone have a Ring camera on the Strait of Hormuz? Just need to know, open or closed? TIA

[Griffin Handley @GriffinHandley]

When did the U.S. Men’s soccer add the leader of China to the team?

[Griffin Handley @GriffinHandley]

If the aliens are already here, why do we need SpaceX?

[Griffin Handley @GriffinHandley]

Causing damage to a SpaceX ship is now domestic terrorism.

[Griffin Handley @GriffinHandley]

Coming to Knicks game 3 is like your mom coming on your honeymoon.

[Griffin Handley @GriffinHandley]

Do you think they’ll pardon Iran this afternoon?

[Griffin Handley @GriffinHandley]

We can capture every meeting between Vrabel and Russini in high definition but all we got is dots we’re calling UFOs.

Everything is the boy in the balloon.

[Griffin Handley @GriffinHandley]

@UConnHuskies

[Griffin Handley @GriffinHandley]

@mccrevenjake Woodshed Smokehouse

[Griffin Handley @GriffinHandley]

@mccrevenjake Pappasito’s Cantina

[Griffin Handley @GriffinHandley]

Kansas making a mistake; it’s playing St. John’s basketball.

St. John’s is making a mistake; it’s playing St. John’s basketball.

Run your sets!

[Griffin Handley @GriffinHandley]

We’re about 24 hours away from a Fyre Festival Cuba announcement.

[Griffin Handley @GriffinHandley]

@ChipotleTweets

[Griffin Handley @GriffinHandley]

If someone could just rejigger the autocorrect so when the word “tariff” is typed it changes to “kisses.”

We would get to see things like, “I’m going to slap Canada with 100% kisses.”

Canadians need love too.

[Griffin Handley @GriffinHandley]

The real Santa. So many gifts.

[Griffin Handley @GriffinHandley]

Made my card

[Griffin Handley @GriffinHandley]

@U2

[Griffin Handley @GriffinHandley]

If DJ’s haven’t replaced marching bands, AI ain’t replacing anything.

People don’t change.