Groob

.ılıll|̲̅̅●̲̅̅|̲̅̅=̲̅̅|̲̅̅●̲̅̅|llılı. I edit photos and usually make them worse in the process

[Groob @GrooveSalad812]

Who gave Belle a gun?!

[Groob @GrooveSalad812]

What could have been

[Nat20 🦇 COMMS OPEN @heyits_nat]

Kresa Telwyn, Au Ra halfbody sketch commission for @GrooveSalad812

[Groob @GrooveSalad812]

Aaaaaaah

[⬜️Ruri⬛️(Comms Open) @Ruri_Artposting]

CHIBIS GALORE!!!
Comms by @HangBoy13 and @GrooveSalad812

[⬜️Ruri⬛️(Comms Open) @Ruri_Artposting]

Commission for @GrooveSalad812 !!
She is just doing some light reading on a totally not evil book :3

[Nat20 🦇 COMMS OPEN @heyits_nat]

Shadowheart waif
#BaldursGate3

[Ster @SterLovesFood]

I finally realized im Bipolar and was diagnosed by a professional.
It is why I am hesitant to commit to more and longer Myriad games.
It is why I'll stream a lot for a week and then not at all.

If you want to read more details I'll use Myriad (my tabletop streams) as a public facing example:

I have a lot of mixed emotions tied up in the Myriad project -- I feel it has been propelled forward by a manic episode or two where I am deeply enthusiastic about it. I also occasionally think it is the absolute worst thing I could be doing with my time and preparing sessions is a torture device of my own creation that I cant escape due to obligations. I am well aware of how dramatic that is.

But every time I feel poorly, I think deeply about my situation and I get over it. I like to problem solve. Thus, I assume I've solved the problem and cleared a path forward where I feel good about it again. About 2 months ago I realized I never actually solve anything, but thinking I have still pushes me further down a path. The ability to overcome extreme doubts about what Im doing is a triumph that pours more fuel into the original direction. No matter how many times that has happened, I kind of just forget how I felt 2 weeks ago because it feels like I've moved passed it. However, there isnt anything real to actually move passed a lot of the time. Im chasing my own tail. I also remember past manic episodes where Im completely invested -- so that becomes the emotional marker that serves as positive guidance (they are typically very goal oriented). But, this is an unreliable extreme which only sounds obvious in hindsight.

Even the doubts are untrustworthy. During the first Myriad game, a player said to me after a session they had one of their favorite tabletop moments ever -- high praise from somebody who plays a lot of tabletop. I felt absolutely nothing. Because I felt nothing, it kind of crushed me and I still think about it. All of that passion in making everything to just actually not care at all about great results. In retrospect... I was probably just in a depressive episode at the time and shouldnt be taking my own emotions 'personally'. Its still kind of hard to ignore and has left its mark despite almost feeling like it was practically a randomly generated emotional response. I tried to problem solve that by taking a break from streaming back then, thinking I was lacking joy from it -- but eventually looped back around because i never had a problem with it to begin with.

Things have been confusing. A manic episode ironically caused me to get evaluated where I was 100% certain this was what was going on. The most profound epiphanies of my life. No doubts at all. Not 99%, 100%. Knowing I was that confident seemed like more evidence to me, as I'm usually reasonable enough to say I cant be 100% sure yet. Next week during the evaluation I rushed into I was more like 20% sure and feeling it was a mistake to be there at all. Im cautious moving forward with anything. I sit on things for quite a while to be sure I actually want to and can do them before making a commitment. I always kind of have been that way, but now its obvious why.

It brings some relief to be able to explain it to myself and to you. Sometimes being aware is worse because the energy that would go to problem solving doesnt go anywhere now. I'm obviously still pursuing Myriad content, but I remain hesitant to commit to multiple games or long term campaigns for the foreseeable future. Thanks and I appreciate you not using this information to construct a long and detailed conspiracy theory about my behavior in the future :)

[Groob @GrooveSalad812]

Fanfest in an alternate timeline

[Groob @GrooveSalad812]

@FritzCaphe You know, you have a point...

[Groob @GrooveSalad812]

Shit's on fire, yo

[⬜️Ruri⬛️(Comms Open) @Ruri_Artposting]

HEY, QUICK PROMO!
I'm going to buy Aseprite to work on a project.
If you want to help out you can go to my Ko-Fi (bio) and, in the next 24hrs, donations that are 10$+ can get a custom chibi like these cuties, just put in the message "GIMME THOSE PIXELS" and send me reference

[Groob @GrooveSalad812]

The best part about being short is that you fit in most overhead storage compartment bins. Save on luggage costs by simply becoming the luggage!

[Groob @GrooveSalad812]

Behold, my talent

[Groob @GrooveSalad812]

@Burdrehnar 1 mil Andy let's gooooo

[Bahroo @AdmiralBahroo]

@DankShamwow @Ruri_Artposting @heyits_nat

[Groob @GrooveSalad812]

If anything good ever came out of that whole fiasco (aside from the community), it was creating this monstrosity

[Groob @GrooveSalad812]

@cheesechimp The King has been taken, and Gufi is all out of hearts to give

[Groob @GrooveSalad812]

I'd watch it

[Groob @GrooveSalad812]

Powerful