Grumpy Cat

There are two kinds of people in this world. And I don't like them. (Not affiliated with The Grumpy Cat)
-Parody-

[Grumpy Cat @GrumpyCatPaw]

My silence is my attitude.

[Grumpy Cat @GrumpyCatPaw]

Facebook needs a "dislike" and a "you're an idiot button."

[Grumpy Cat @GrumpyCatPaw]

Honey Boo Boo's mother has a boyfriend and you're single... Just let that sink in.

[Grumpy Cat @GrumpyCatPaw]

Nice tan, what's your race? Carrot?

[Grumpy Cat @GrumpyCatPaw]

Free food? ..okay I'll go.

[Grumpy Cat @GrumpyCatPaw]

I saw a spider in the bathtub, so I got a piece of tissue and very, very carefully, burned the house down.

[Grumpy Cat @GrumpyCatPaw]

I laugh during inappropriate situations.

[Grumpy Cat @GrumpyCatPaw]

I can't hear you over the sound of how awesome I am.

[Grumpy Cat @GrumpyCatPaw]

I don't care if I'm pissing you off, learn how to take a joke.

[Grumpy Cat @GrumpyCatPaw]

I hate it when you have to be nice to someone you really want to throw a brick at.

[Grumpy Cat @GrumpyCatPaw]

I hate it when someone else takes the piece of food I mentally claimed.

[Grumpy Cat @GrumpyCatPaw]

Ever look at your best friend and wonder why the hell you aren't comedians?

[Grumpy Cat @GrumpyCatPaw]

I'm fluent in three languages: English, Sarcasm, and Profanity.

[Grumpy Cat @GrumpyCatPaw]

Stressing out about crap I have no control over is probably what I do best.

[Grumpy Cat @GrumpyCatPaw]

Statistics show that people with the most birthdays tend to live the longest.

[Grumpy Cat @GrumpyCatPaw]

When I open a bag of bread, I skip the first piece. Because it's ugly.

[Grumpy Cat @GrumpyCatPaw]

People who investigate strange noises in horror movies deserve to die.

[Grumpy Cat @GrumpyCatPaw]

I hate it when I plan a conversation in my head and the other person doesn't follow the script.

[Grumpy Cat @GrumpyCatPaw]

Your status makes me want to punch you in the face. -_-

[Grumpy Cat @GrumpyCatPaw]

School Tomorrow School Schoo Scho Sch Sc S Sm Smo Smok Smoke Smoke meth and ditch class