When I say modern-day dating has become miserable and is more of a humiliation ritual than love, this is what I mean.
Look at her texts and the misery in her life. she tried to put in her best effort and wanted to talk to him, but instead, she became meme material on the internet because he wanted some likes and validation.
In 1998, I was fired from my corporate job while 9 months pregnant because and I quote, “my priorities would be elsewhere after the baby is born.”
The lawyer I hired told me I didn’t have a case because discrimination like “that” was almost impossible to prove.
So I got pissed.
Took the LSAT. Went to law school. Passed the bar. Had 3 more kids.
Twelve years later, another woman from that same company was fired for the same reason. She sued them for a million dollars, and won, partly because I had kept every piece of evidence from what happened to me years prior demonstrating a systemic pattern of discrimination against women.
That company no longer exists. My law practice is thriving. And that baby they said would derail my priorities? She’s a brilliant attorney now working at my firm.
Turns out my priorities were indeed, elsewhere.
When you discover that it’s because of feminism that you, a woman, can enjoy the things you enjoy, you should be more vocal against a system that has oppressed your gender for millennia.
You are educated today and can own a phone and tweet, create content because of feminism, not cos of technology o, feminism.
Women before you took a stand and were even killed for it. Men used every system including the Bible to oppress women. We still see expressions of such ideologies today.
You don’t want to identify as a “feminist”, because you’re a christian and being Christian is enough. No problems. In fact, I hear you.
However, the responsibility is now on you to speak boldly and directly against misogyny and patriarchy using our Christian persuasion from the holistic understanding of scripture.
It should be very easy to do that. Start from the church and spread the message everywhere else.
Teach on the equality of their worth before God. Teach that the women and children department, serving puffpuff,etc is not an exclusive office for women, the women should also preach, teach, disciple God’s people and start full gospel ministries as God leads.
Teach on single men respecting the boundaries of women and not feeling intimidated by their ambition and success.
Teach how headship in a home is not for subjugation but sacrifice and a desire to die for your wife in a heartbeat.
Teach women that submission IN A MARRIAGE is NOT a relinquishing of their identity and purpose but honour for their husbands under God.
Teach women that staying in an abusive marriage and relationship is NOT scriptural—They should leave! Teach them that submission in a marriage shouldn’t cut short their destinies and diminish their worth and self esteem.
Teach women that marriage is NOT a must and if it will happen, it must be on God’s terms with a worthy male partner. Teach them that God is NOT waiting for them to be married before fulfilling purpose. Teach them not to shrink for male validation because they are both made in the image and likeness of God.
Teach men how God never said the husband must be richer/bigger/more famous than the wife. Teach men to not just allow their women shine but support and deeply encourage it because that is what being a husband is about.
Teach how men should be able to cook because it is a survival skill. Teach on how men should be actively involved in their children’s lives without seeking brownie points because that is what normal parenting is. I could go on.
"You cannot be a Christian and be feminist"
Every damn time.
How about "You cannot be a Christian and be misogynist"
How about "Drop your patriarchy and faux supremacy at home for awon molebi ile Grandpa eh"
How about that?
You people are unserious.
Make sure you are not using your “Women should not be Pastors” argument as a mask for your hate/apathy/distrust of women.
Because it’s so hard not to knock off that it provides a base where you can latch on the texts because it serves your selfishness.
Until Nigeria declares war against corruption in education with the same seriousness we discuss politics every day, we will keep producing graduates who hold certificates but cannot build a nation.
This is a national security issue.
A country full of certificates and yet companies keep saying that they can’t find qualified people.
Marriage is still beautiful.
Still worth praying for.
Still worth preparing for.
Two imperfect people, choosing each other daily, growing in love, grace, patience, forgiveness, laughter, and purpose.
May we all find a love that feels safe, godly, intentional, and peaceful.