Yeshiva Har Torah

We’re a Modern Orthodox elementary school serving LI and Queens. Our Head of School isn’t on Twitter. He doesn’t need to know about this.

[Yeshiva Har Torah @HarTorah]

Us: “Should we keep doing this? People seem to like it but is it helping the school?”

Friend in marketing: “Keep going. Everything is brand recognition.”

Us: “But, shouldn’t we show off our incredible teachers & educa…”

Friend: “Shh. Recognition”

Us: “But…”

Friend: “Shhh.”

[Yeshiva Har Torah @HarTorah]

Folks, we are just a few weeks away from floor hockey returning, for some reason.

[Yeshiva Har Torah @HarTorah]

Came back just to say hi to Jack.

[Yeshiva Har Torah @HarTorah]

Arrival is an amazing movie but it’s telling about current society that, in a movie featuring aliens landing all over the world in massive spaceships, the most unrealistic part is that a linguistics professor does something of value.

[Kalshi Film @Kalshi_Film]

Blade Runner 2049 or Arrival?

[Yeshiva Har Torah @HarTorah]

While eating dairy While digesting dairy

[Yeshiva Har Torah @HarTorah]

Tap, hold, and load in 4K?

Are we doing this right?

[Yeshiva Har Torah @HarTorah]

@JMMusings @DBashIdeas A fan of Fleetwood Mac, we see…

[Yeshiva Har Torah @HarTorah]

@AriBermanYU He clearly didn’t win this for his basketball skills

[Yeshiva Har Torah @HarTorah]

@AriBermanYU He clearly didn’t win this for his basketball skills

[Yeshiva Har Torah @HarTorah]

@JewishHockey Wut

[Yeshiva Har Torah @HarTorah]

Parents: “Why doesn’t school let my kids bring in candy?”

Their kid in school:

[Yeshiva Har Torah @HarTorah]

@DBashIdeas We would like to improve the culture

[Yeshiva Har Torah @HarTorah]

Stop it with the sushi menorahs and give us the kabob menorahs already.

[Yeshiva Har Torah @HarTorah]

Stop it with the sushi menorahs and give us the kabob menorahs already.

[Yeshiva Har Torah @HarTorah]

@Badchonews @VaadHaBadchanim “We shall have two different, unrelated systems of calculating the year. One of them will make sense to the entire world. The other will be super random. Our great nation will use the random one.”

[Yeshiva Har Torah @HarTorah]

@Badchonews @VaadHaBadchanim “Money will be measured in sela, dinar, and prutah. 4 dinar to a sela…”

“… 4 prutah to a dinar…”

“If it were only so simple.”

“And how many prutah to a sela, sir?”

“768, of course. It’s a simple number that everyone will remember.”

[Yeshiva Har Torah @HarTorah]

@VaadHaBadchanim “Sssssometimes first, sometimes seventh….”

[Yeshiva Har Torah @HarTorah]

@JewishHockey Credit to @CMSsports

[Cardigan Mountain School @CardiganMtnSchl]

Congratulations to the Varsity Hockey Cougars for taking the win at the Belmont Hill Holiday Tournament for the fourth straight year! 👏👏👏

[Yeshiva Har Torah @HarTorah]

@JewishHockey Very good, but:

[Yeshiva Har Torah @HarTorah]

@Badchonews @VaadHaBadchanim “We shall establish holidays called the ‘regalim.’”

“The regalim, sir?”

“Yes, it’s a series of holidays when the kohanim bless people with their hands...”