He-Man

Parody. Not affiliated in any way with Masters of The Universe, Mattel or Filmation. I HAVE THE POWER! (and Skeletor knows it)

[He-Man @Hateful_HeMan]

Remember guys, all people are created equal. Except for @GrumpySkeletor, who's a twat.

[He-Man @Hateful_HeMan]

Dear Diary, why am I such a massive twat and why is @Hateful_HeMan so amazing?

Also, why isn't @piersmorgan answering my fan mail?

[He-Man @Hateful_HeMan]

Which is best?

[He-Man @Hateful_HeMan]

Just threw Christmas leftovers at Snake Mountain, called @GrumpySkeletor a massive arsebadger, and quickly jumped on the 92 bus back to Castle Grayskull. He looks absolutely livid! #ihavethepower 💪🏼🗡

[He-Man @Hateful_HeMan]

Things that prove how much of a pissbucket @GrumpySkeletor really is;

- Every time I try to talk to him instead of punching him in the face he makes that annoying "WYAH" noise
- He uses a new toilet roll so he doesn't have to replace the old one
- He thinks @piersmorgan is great

[He-Man @Hateful_HeMan]

#TuesdayThoughts
- Can Eternia be made great again?
- What aftershave does Stinkor wear?
- Why is @GrumpySkeletor such a pisswizard?

#Ihavethepower 💪 🗡️

[He-Man @Hateful_HeMan]

Skeletor jerking off invisible dicks for Christmas #utterbellend

[He-Man @Hateful_HeMan]

The best LSD trip me and Man-At-Arms ever had! #weeeeeeeee #offourtits

[He-Man @Hateful_HeMan]

Throwback to when my absolutely arseholed Dad was being an absolute arsehole at the '83 Royal Palace Ball. He's so embarrassing and he's not even that hard! #fakemuscles #royalball 💪🏼🗡

[He-Man @Hateful_HeMan]

FUN FACT: I really fucking hurt my left hand doing this. Serious life-changing tendon damage. Don't fuck about with swords, kids 💪🏼🗡

[He-Man @Hateful_HeMan]

Just go, @GrumpySkeletor. You've dragged the dark side of Eternia into a never-ending bog of shit jokes & destroyed your face with all that cosmetic acid vat dunking. Show some dignity and just fuck off. #SkeletorOUT #ihavethepower 💪🏼🗡 https://t.co/7el6JCNJ72

[Piers Morgan @piersmorgan]

Just go, Wenger. You’ve dragged Arsenal into a never-ending mire of mediocrity & destroyed your once great legacy. Show some bloody self-respect man & GO.

[He-Man @Hateful_HeMan]

Took the afternoon off today to buy some new furry underpants. Got my mate Fisto to punch @GrumpySkeletor's head in with his massive fuck off fist just because #wehavethepower 💪 🗡️ 👊

[He-Man @Hateful_HeMan]

#RejectedRoadNames - Skeletor Street was in the pipeline for a while, but was correctly rejected because @GrumpySkeletor is a massive bellend #ihavethepower 💪 🗡️

[He-Man @Hateful_HeMan]

As expected. #stablegenius #ihavethepower 💪🏼💪🏼💪🏼 https://t.co/wlfgHAiuSr

[He-Man @Hateful_HeMan]

Who has the power?

[He-Man @Hateful_HeMan]

- Stock up on Protein Shakes
- Wash my hair in the Sea of Rakash
- Defend Castle Grayskull from the penis that is Skeletor #SundayMorning #ihavethepower 💪🏼🗡

[He-Man @Hateful_HeMan]

Tossers.

[He-Man @Hateful_HeMan]

Who has the power?

[He-Man @Hateful_HeMan]

Today Skeletor called me a mop-headed twatwomble, so I threw him up a tree #ihavethepower

[He-Man @Hateful_HeMan]

@realDonaldTrump

[He-Man @Hateful_HeMan]

#FAKENEWS https://t.co/n1ZIHJlQJp

[He-Man @Hateful_HeMan]

WHO CAN MAKE ETERNIA GREAT AGAIN??

[He-Man @Hateful_HeMan]

WHO CAN MAKE ETERNIA GREAT AGAIN??