Melissa Lewis

World traveler turned desert rat, fabric addict, tattooed, bag designer, collector of oddities, gardener, laundry lass, homework checker & cat servant.

[Melissa Lewis @HautTotes]

You know how they say your life flashes before your eyes when you die. You think there’s like a bloopers reel at the end?

[Christopher Moore @TheAuthorGuy]

Your Daily Affirmation:
And lo, though fuckweasels and asshats would vex me, they harsh not my mood, for they are but ephemeral wisps of ignorance, incapable of diverting my attention and drive from the joy, spice, and satisfaction that is my life on Taco Tuesday. Amen.

[Melissa Lewis @HautTotes]

Not the best day to announce this heinous fuckery. https://t.co/08Dpmu4M9L

[Melissa Lewis @HautTotes]

I am thankful for many things, today I am genuinely thrilled to add that orcas are once again wearing salmon hats!
What are you thankful for?
https://t.co/T1ovN3IYXl

[Brian Cardone 🏴‍☠️🇺🇦 @cardon_brian]

🚨Holy Shit!! Rep Jasmine Crockett (D-TX) brought that smoke that no MAGA Republican knows how to deal with. This is how we have to talk to these troglodytes from now on if we want to beat these wannabe fascists! Kudos Congresswoman! 💥🔥💥#DemVoice1

[💙Brittney💙 @AZ_Brittney]

💯

[Melissa Lewis @HautTotes]

Interesting that Gaetz removed himself from consideration two days after the ethics committee report on him was hacked...

[MeidasTouch @MeidasTouch]

What happened here with Don Jr at the SpaceX launch today

[Melissa Lewis @HautTotes]

@JSumabi @v8mile How can you possibly think you know the feelings and intentions of her father? Going no contact with a parent is tremendously difficult and not something anyone takes lightly or does easily.

[Melissa Lewis @HautTotes]

@v8mile ❤️🧡💛💚💙💜🖤🤎🤍

[Melissa Lewis @HautTotes]

@TheAuthorGuy More like 4 interminable years… 🤢

[Trae Crowder @traecrowder]

Alright well….Ima keep runnin my mouth til they throw me in the gulag that’s all I know.

[Melissa Lewis @HautTotes]

Our country just showed our children we would rather elect a rapist who blows microphones over a woman.

[Christopher Moore @TheAuthorGuy]

Remember when CNN let the reporters drink on the air New Year's Eve and you'd have Don Lemon doing body shots off a wooden statue of a sailor and Kathy Griffin crushed it by keeping Anderson Cooper in tears? I think that formula would work here.

[Christopher Moore @TheAuthorGuy]

Ima barf

[Christopher Moore @TheAuthorGuy]

This came too close after daylight savings time ended. It feels like it's midnight and it's 5:30 -- dread rises.

[Melissa Lewis @HautTotes]

@TheAuthorGuy Me too. Not sure if it’s from my feelings, or from eating them…

[Harshmallow 🏳️‍🌈🏴‍☠️ Rogue Antifa, Inc. @Nikki2U]

I’m not the type to extend any olive branches to MAGA or anyone else at the bottom of the horseshoe after this election. Dude is 🔥🤌

[Melissa Lewis @HautTotes]

I think I’m developing an ulcer. I am not sure if it's from my feelings, or from eating them.