Shelby

young adult. heart transplant(s). probably hungry.

[Shelby @HeartIsntMine]

I’m just saying, if Darth Maul could survive being cut in half and fall down a planets core than Mace Windu can survive falling off a building and if that’s the case then MASTER WINDU BETTER COME BACK IN THE MANDALORIAN AND TEAM UP WITH BABY YODA #Mandalorian

[Shelby @HeartIsntMine]

The National Dog Show is better than the Macy’s Thanksgiving Parade fight me #Thanksgiving

[Shelby @HeartIsntMine]

I will throw hands if Claire De Lune plays at my wedding I swear

[Shelby @HeartIsntMine]

My government professor thinks a civil war is about to break out no matter who wins so I stocked up on a lot of soup and mac n cheese

[Shelby @HeartIsntMine]

You know how I know that I’m such a depressed piece of shit adult. I just asked for a vacuum for Christmas. A VACCUM. For ChRiStMaS. How, when, and why did I get this way #thisisbullshit #makeitaroomba

[Shelby @HeartIsntMine]

Can’t wait for this election to be over so miscellaneous democrats will stop texting me 🤮

[Shelby @HeartIsntMine]

How do you get the democrats to stop calling and texting you. Yes I’m voting now plz leave me alone. #biden2020

[Shelby @HeartIsntMine]

Honestly the biggest tragedy of 2020 is the lack of pho restaurants with outdoor seating 🥺

[Shelby @HeartIsntMine]

I am a sad level of excited about getting cleaning supplies in the mail

[Shelby @HeartIsntMine]

I just threw my servers apron in the trash and I must say it was a very empowering experience

[Shelby @HeartIsntMine]

I have a specific desire to acquire a crafty friend. That person who will gladly go to Michaels with you, decorate for the holidays with you, be excited to upcycle with you, and be your go to wine and scrapbook night person.

[Shelby @HeartIsntMine]

I just realized how horrible the past WEEK has been let alone the whole fucking year. California is on fire. Hurricane Laura will destroy everything in her path. The shit show that is the RNC. MORE police brutality AND the surge in COVID cases so sororities can pLeDgE #imdone

[Shelby @HeartIsntMine]

Can I please have some more money #helpmeimpoor

[Shelby @HeartIsntMine]

The pandemic isn’t over just because you’re over it #wearamask

[Shelby @HeartIsntMine]

Daily advice: Don’t touch your ear after cutting jalapeños #myearisonfire

[Shelby @HeartIsntMine]

Being an adult is eating fruit snacks in the morning and having a breakdown in the afternoon #itsatrap

[Shelby @HeartIsntMine]

Tbh I don’t think I’m ever going into a grocery store ever again. Why go inside when you can just curbside. #iswearthisisntanadvertisment

[Shelby @HeartIsntMine]

If one’s religion doesn’t allow them to express themselves through The Black Eyed Peas “My Humps” as a child, then it’s not a religion worth following.

[Shelby @HeartIsntMine]

When I retire I just want to own a cute, eclectic candy shop and slowly die.

[Shelby @HeartIsntMine]

EXCUSE ME WHILE I POUR MYSELF A GLASS OF WINE AND LISTEN TO LADY GAGA’S ENTIRE NEW ALBUM #Chromatica #LadyGaga #redalert