Heather Mayo

I'm heather. I like to laugh at inappropriate and dark humor.

[Heather Mayo @HeatherrMayoo]

Who’s looking to buy a French bulldog pup for a Valentine’s Day gift?! On special NOW so hurry and snag one of our boys while you still can! 😍
Frenchies truly make the BEST companions! Unconditional love and attention! 😘

[Heather Mayo @HeatherrMayoo]

Our girl got to see her first ever concert and she chose @FIROfficial and @RonnieRadke she LOVED it!

[Heather Mayo @HeatherrMayoo]

My cheer babes got to take home gold medals at their first ever competition Sunday! So incredibly proud of their performance! They’re timing was great, sharp motions, smiling (& sass) everywhere, it was amazing! This is why I love to coach! Pushing these girls to do their best!❤️

[Heather Mayo @HeatherrMayoo]

That wonderful moment when you’re having a bad day, stop to get gas, and then a fire truck shows up to get gas as you’re leaving…and they ALL get out of that truck. 😍
I almost pretended to not know how to work the air pump on my tire. 🤷🏻‍♀️😂

[Heather Mayo @HeatherrMayoo]

My daughter, who has LOVED rap music since she was a toddler and wanted to listen to Welcome to my Hood every morning before school for a whole year, told me this morning to pause that exact song before she got out at the drop out line so the teachers didn’t hear it. 🙄

[Heather Mayo @HeatherrMayoo]

Whyyy does it seem like every single time you get comfortable in bed you gotta go pee?! 😫

[Heather Mayo @HeatherrMayoo]

Proof that cats understand English: I was petting my cat while listening and singing along to Stupid Hoes by Nicki Minaj and my cat bit me. 🙄 I told her I wasn’t talking to her. But she’s petty.

[Heather Mayo @HeatherrMayoo]

If anyone was wondering who the psycho running back and forth between the hospital to the parking lot with arm loads of boxes was, that’s me.

[Heather Mayo @HeatherrMayoo]

Told Mavis I would teach her to spell bananas so we turned on @gwenstefani Hollaback Girl. 🤷🏻‍♀️ I’m a millennial mom through and through. 😜

[Heather Mayo @HeatherrMayoo]

The best part about being home alone is that when you put something down, you know where to find it. The worst part about being home alone is when you put more than one thing down and forget where you put it and now have to find it. 🙄🤦🏻‍♀️😂

[Heather Mayo @HeatherrMayoo]

I’ve seriously had the worst day I’ve had in a very long time. I really just want to hide under my blankets and not come out.

[Heather Mayo @HeatherrMayoo]

I love that I work with physical therapists and speech pathologists that can tell me if something is normal or not normal. 😂

[Heather Mayo @HeatherrMayoo]

I feel like maybe I should just send out a blanket apology to everyone I’ve encountered in the 22 hrs straight that I’ve been awake today due to me not being able to STOP talking. My brain decides the best way to stay awake all day is to just talk and talk. 🤦🏻‍♀️

[Heather Mayo @HeatherrMayoo]

So it turns out, being at a physical therapy clinic super early by yourself is a tad bit terrifying when you hear random noises and don’t recognize where they come from. 🤦🏻‍♀️😂

[Heather Mayo @HeatherrMayoo]

My daughter just watched me grab my bottle of water, take a big drink, and right before I got to the end of it, yelled “wait, I want some!” 😑 then she finished it off. Kids, man. 🙄

[Heather Mayo @HeatherrMayoo]

This is the first time in a long time that I have to renew my tag and I don’t work at a car dealership where I can just send my money with the company’s work to get it done quickly. That’s why I waited until the last possible day to even do it before I’m penalized. 🤦🏻‍♀️

[Heather Mayo @HeatherrMayoo]

I will never understand the women that think they need to tear down other women to get further in anything. Or the ones who act nice then make sly comments to try to make someone feel bad about themselves.

[Heather Mayo @HeatherrMayoo]

My poor kid has been sick all day and I finally get her to stop throwing up long enough to fall asleep but I can’t fall asleep now since I’m worried she might get sick in her sleep and keep checking to make sure she’s still breathing. 😢

[Heather Mayo @HeatherrMayoo]

Really wanting to get rid of my uterus right now. I didn’t get any sleep and will need to start getting ready for working within an hour and I don’t want to move the heating pad to do that. 🙄

[Heather Mayo @HeatherrMayoo]

I’m pretty sure one of my neighbors just woke me up at 3am by mowing their lawn. I swear I hear a lawn mower out there. 😑