Hellbender

Your average GAU 8/A Avenger, 30mm hydraulically driven, seven barrel Gatling style auto-cannon.

[Hellbender @Hellb3nder_]

Polo shirts are the uniform of the slave class

[Saturn @SaturnDL_]

Yo this is frying me

[Hellbender @Hellb3nder_]

The most American restaurant you can go to is a Greek pizzeria that serves Italian food made by Central Americans of questionable immigration status

[Hellbender @Hellb3nder_]

They're putting more glue on paper towels so that you rip more when starting the roll #enshittification

[Hellbender @Hellb3nder_]

@_SatanWatch He was brutally unprepared for the swift decline of his relevance.

[Specter @DemonFramed]

I’m officially transitioning from a nihilistic doomer to a hedonistic absurdist.

I’ve accepted that society is a collapsing mental asylum run by narcissists, worshipped by NPCs, and funded by wage slaves.

Nothing has meaning, morality is cosplay, and the future is already cooked.

So I’m done being depressed. I’m getting drunk, chasing pleasure, laughing at the chaos, and enjoying humanity’s extinction event from the VIP section.

[Roman Helmet Guy @romanhelmetguy]

Living standards in America should have risen 10 times over since 1950. Think of the technology then vs now. Instead our elite made every American worker compete with 8 billion third-worlders by offshoring all manufacturing to China, outsourcing all IT to India, and importing the entire population of South and Central America. And so big surprise: The rest of the world saw their living standards rise 1000% while yours went down. All so that the richest 1% of Americans from the richest generation in history could die just a little richer before it all comes crashing down and communists kill their grandkids.

[zilla @rawrxzilla]

chinese led zeppelin be like: been a rong time been a rong time been a rong ronery ronery ronery time

[Jimmy “Jonesin” Maverick @EXP0SETHEFRAUD]

Yeah bro buying an old house is a fucking nightmare. I’ve never spent so much god damn money to be pissed off fixing shit. Then my wife thinks I’m god damn Bob the fucking builder.

“Oh men are suppose to be handy” fuck you, I grew up playing runescape I don’t know shit about fuck to fix shit.

Oh watch YouTube. Watch a tik tok. God I want to kill myself.

[Dudes Posting Their W’s @DudespostingWs]

Billy Strings’ real name is William Apostol. His aunt nicknamed him “Billy Strings” as a child because he could already play several stringed instruments. Today, he’s arguably one of the best guitarists alive.

[Hellbender @Hellb3nder_]

Who keeps telling people that big fuckass Jeffy Dahmer glasses are it? You don't look good in them, stop it.

[Hellbender @Hellb3nder_]

@lorenzoagain I've come to the same conclusion off too many gummies during set break. It's still fun to dip your toes in the water, just don't stay in the pool too long

[Billy Strings @BillyStrings]

This album came at a time in my life when I had a lot to write about. I had just lost my mother last June and still felt the talons of grief piercing my back. Before she passed, she and I had planned on trying to use some of her poetry to make songs from, but that just hasn’t panned out yet. A lot of her poetry is very stream-of-conscious, and I just couldn’t figure out how to put it to a tune. Maybe someday I will. Another dream we had was having her make art for the next record cover. She was an amazing artist and was constantly working on many different things. She would call me all the time and tell me about how she was painting this or gluing this thing to that to make some UFO alien battle with cowboys and fairies. All her pieces had a story. The piece we ended up using for the cover was the one she was working on the night she died. I believe her intention was to show it to me when it was finished to see if I would use it for the cover. Although I don’t believe she had the chance to complete it, I am so happy we were able to fulfill that dream. I never got to say goodbye to her. That’s why I wanted to call the album “So Much For Goodbyes.” When I mentioned it to my manager, his interpretation of it was different from mine. I was sad that I didn’t get to say goodbye, but when I told him the name of the album, he heard it from a different perspective. It’s not goodbye. She’s not gone. She’s very much still with me. So much for goodbyes.

[Hellbender @Hellb3nder_]

@libsoftiktok Show the letter stupid

[Hellbender @Hellb3nder_]

@ChrisMurphyCT @CNN @kaitlancollins Oh wow two people who reflexively hate anything a Republican administration does! I'm sure the conversation will be riveting!

[Hellbender @Hellb3nder_]

@fleshsimulator Optimized simulated slop bowl.

[Hellbender @Hellb3nder_]

@CuriosityonX Anyone that went to Afghanistan also has a scar like this. They tell you to pick which arm you want it on.

[Thomas Massie @RepThomasMassie]

If legislators always vote with the President, we have a king.

If legislators always vote with the prevailing wind, we have mob rule.

If legislators always vote with the Constitution, we have a Republic.

[Hellbender @Hellb3nder_]

@cliptis86 @Mobalytics Didn't the patch nerf this with Highlander COA? Hearing mixed things

[Hellbender @Hellb3nder_]

Patience Buffalo, the Bruins are only allowed to be reverse swept