The universe is born. 13.8 billion years pass. 200 billion trillion stars are born. A band of murderous monkeys on a rock circling one of these stars says, “We must be the reason for all this.” Shortly after, the monkeys blow themselves up.
@UnwinderH Yeah, I really liked A Short History of Nearly Everything but I’m getting down about how every time I read a book lately, there’s something weird about women in it. Even topics that you’d think they couldn’t manage it, like physics or philosophy or neuroscience, it’s incredible
@urwalder I had read A Short History of Nearly Everything and he managed not to mention utterly delectable teenagers in it so I thought this would be smooth sailing
@AnthonyLaFauci@reachfh The guy just said, hey, maybe this would explain her reaction, and said nothing negative about you, and you can’t handle hearing another perspective? Geez.
British people make snacks sound so delicious. Do I want a packet of crisps? A PACKET of CRISPS? Incredible. Mouth-watering. Yes, please, a packet of crisps sounds life-changing. Oh, it’s just a bag of chips.
The phrase, “That’s a common misconception” is supposed to make you feel better but what I hear is, “Not only are you wrong but you are wrong in the most plebeian and unpoetic way possible. You are, to me, confirmation of materialism and the lack of a human soul.”
My favorite ancient artifact is 2000 year old graffiti from Roman tourists complaining that Egyptian tombs are boring and they should have vacationed somewhere else