Clyde Klein

American

[Clyde Klein @HeyItsClyde]

I still got the pack of camel crushes sitting on my dresser. I'm gonna give it to my little kids.

[Clyde Klein @HeyItsClyde]

If she's sober enough to drive home she's sober enough to come pick me up

[Clyde Klein @HeyItsClyde]

I have ears like the eyes of a hawk

[Clyde Klein @HeyItsClyde]

Oh my God, who broke Spongebob?

[Clyde Klein @HeyItsClyde]

My dick just broke the ice

[Clyde Klein @HeyItsClyde]

Don't smile you get wrinkles that way.

[Clyde Klein @HeyItsClyde]

You don't have any wrinkles and you look like a Mexican

[Clyde Klein @HeyItsClyde]

You know what's awesome? When you take a huge fucking shit in Walmart and just leave it.

[Clyde Klein @HeyItsClyde]

Hey sorry I stopped talking to you. You're probably used to it.

[Clyde Klein @HeyItsClyde]

When you bust a nut it just explodes. "I like that"-Brittany

[Clyde Klein @HeyItsClyde]

10-4 we got a drunk ass walking into kwik trip

[Clyde Klein @HeyItsClyde]

I wanna get a tattoo with an American flag with my grandpas date of birth and the day I die.

[Clyde Klein @HeyItsClyde]

He doesn't wanna think about skinning a cat

[Clyde Klein @HeyItsClyde]

The only thing I know how to really do is cry a lot

[Clyde Klein @HeyItsClyde]

I was just talking to the hottest girl in the bar, and guess what. She didn't wanna see my hairy balls.

[Clyde Klein @HeyItsClyde]

I'm good at being the home wrecker

[Clyde Klein @HeyItsClyde]

A ring never plugged a hole

[Clyde Klein @HeyItsClyde]

Yeah I'm a liar. "That's not s good quality to have". Well at least I'm honest about lying.

[Clyde Klein @HeyItsClyde]

I thought about what I was going to think about

[Clyde Klein @HeyItsClyde]

Who the hell is @b05871a728cd432 Brandon Klein and why is he playin on my twatter?