I grew up in a dark place. I love my family and I’m grateful for the lessons I learned but I suffered a lot along the way. When I was in high school I saw a Craigslist ad of a farm looking to get rid of some puppies. I drove 2 hours in my beat up Acura and with my money saved from my retail job I bought my best friend. I named him Swift. He became a light that I never knew I could have.
I didn’t know what true love was before him. I had never had the chance to witness it. But I quickly learned the definition because of him. He held me thru breakups and hard ships. He held me when I lost my mom. He held me when I lost my identity. He held me when I couldn’t get up. Some struggles I’ve faced over the years made me wonder if I should be alive or if I should let myself go. But I always had a tether holding me. My beautiful boy who loved me unconditionally in a way that kept me here. Some days I didn’t even have it in me to get out of bed and Swift would remind me it’s time to get up. I have never loved anyone or anything the way I love Swift.
For 15 years he was the light of my life. The reason for my world. And now he’s not here. I don’t know how I’m going to survive.
For 15 years he was the first thing I saw in the morning and the last thing I saw before falling asleep.
When we would go for walks he wouldn’t watch the path he would turn back and constantly make sure I was still with him. What he didn’t know is I needed him as much as he needed me.
To say I’m heart broken is an understatement. I’m shattered down to my core. The only consistent love I’ve ever had in my life is gone. I would move mountains for Swift, and I promise I fucking tried. I’ve lost a part of my soul with him.
I wish I could do more. I wish I got more. I would give anything in the world right now to have him next to me. I’ve experienced a lot of grief in my life but this is a rare kind. I’ve loved Swift more than I loved myself on numerous occasions. I would do it all again. Every appointment, every cancelled plan, every adjustment in my schedule to make sure he got what he needed. I love that dog more than I love life itself. I hope he knows that. Thank you all for loving him too.
A few weeks ago Swift experienced acute hind leg paralysis from IVDD. I’ve spent the last few weeks nursing him back to health getting him to the point he could walk again. However, he was still on strict crate rest for another 3 weeks.
Today on his “walk” he jumped out of his stroller and hit his head and had a seizure. He is currently hospitalized in critical condition.
He is the light of my life. If you believe in god or even if you don’t please pray for him or even just send good vibes. This dog is my world and my best friend. I’m praying for a miracle.
My sweet cat, my companion Nomu suddenly passed today.
Truly, if there is a God you actually made a being worth feeling this pain I feel.
She was a beacon of love & comfort from a kitten to 9 years.
Thank you for spending your life with me.
I love you forever.
Made it to the big 30 and honestly I don’t know if ill ever forget this year In the beginning of February I lost my mom she was sick for years with kidney disease and it led to her getting severe heart failure and in the end thats what took her and it still doesnt seem real to me
So if I dont have her here on this day I know she is still watching over me and pushing me to keep on going so to my actual friends that are taking the time to read this I thank you guys a lot and appreciate you being around all these years and lets see what happens when we hit40
Thanks to her though she sacrificed a lot of things in her life and guided me in the right direction and taught me how to be independent and I know she was and is proud of me for everything I’ve accomplished and will still continue to do so
I need someone who knows more than me tell me why video game development goes:
Release do do ca ca game when its not ready because shareholders -> game is dew dew so no one likes it and -> poor sales
Instead of
Keep game in development longer -> release good/better game -> make more money - > shareholders happy?