Melissa Horstmann

Pediatric, RN Dog Mom🐾

[Melissa Horstmann @Horstmann_23]

Being sick is for the birds 🤒

[Melissa Horstmann @Horstmann_23]

When they send you to adult to be a nurse for the night 👎🏼 makes me wanna quit … stay at home mom sounds better and better

[Melissa Horstmann @Horstmann_23]

New Top Gun movie 10/10 …Miles Teller you already know, but Tom Cruise looks pretty damn good for almost being 60.

[Melissa Horstmann @Horstmann_23]

When you get a moms night out …. Crow bar it is

[Melissa Horstmann @Horstmann_23]

Well got covid 🤷🏻‍♀️ and I’ve been watching food tik tok for the last 3 hours cuz I can’t sleep. I swear if I lose my taste I’m gonna be pissed. #hungry

[Melissa Horstmann @Horstmann_23]

When you get home and your best friend isn’t there to greet you … my heart is broken 😞 I think it’s gonna take me awhile not to turn around and look for you…#missmybestfriend🐾

[Melissa Horstmann @Horstmann_23]

Dentist offices should supply heated blankets like nail salons it would really help me not convulse in the chair … my poor hygienist probably thinks I’m crazy #alwayscold 🤷🏻‍♀️

[Melissa Horstmann @Horstmann_23]

Well it’s officially winter … hands have started to crack and bleed from washing them so much #nurselife #lovethisforme

[Melissa Horstmann @Horstmann_23]

Having to work all of Christmas makes me a grinch #hatehatehateloatheentirely

[Melissa Horstmann @Horstmann_23]

My sweet boy goes to daycare tomorrow 🥺 I am unwell #hesfineitsjustme #betsonwhocriesfirst

[Melissa Horstmann @Horstmann_23]

Iowa wins holy shit

[Melissa Horstmann @Horstmann_23]

Iowa needs a new QB #horrible

[Melissa Horstmann @Horstmann_23]

My poor kid isn’t even born yet, but Hawkeye football has started and I’m contemplating how hard it would be to strap a newborn to my chest so I can go to a game. #mommylikesfootball #hesgotajersey 🤷🏻‍♀️#iseenoissues

[Melissa Horstmann @Horstmann_23]

I’ve never hated nursing more than tonight #adultsarenotforme #needanewjob

[Melissa Horstmann @Horstmann_23]

The amount of hair my husky loses is insane it’s like taking her to the groomer doesn’t even matter ... she’s lucky she’s cute

[Melissa Horstmann @Horstmann_23]

@JoeBiden That’s what trumps been saying the whole time

[Melissa Horstmann @Horstmann_23]

Annoyed beyond belief from people #Fakepeopleirritateme

[Melissa Horstmann @Horstmann_23]

Sad there won’t be any Iowa football this year #saturdayswontbethesame

[Melissa Horstmann @Horstmann_23]

Figured out plane rides are more enjoyable if you drink .... hello Nashville

[Melissa Horstmann @Horstmann_23]

When the hand sanitizer smells like tequila #nocovidhere