Khalas. This is actually something I want. I'm done thinking and thinking and thinking and praying once or twice and not being satisfied because I never wanted it enough. I've never wanted something more in my life to happen than this. My heart has been in one place for months.
Ibn al-Qayyim رحمه الله:
"One of the signs of someone who truly knows Allāh is that they don't grieve over what they lose, nor do they become overly happy with what they gain.
If your intellect is sound, your fitrah is pure, and your insight is clear,
you'll naturally abstain from haram, feel repulsed by it, and detest it.
The pleasures of haram will cease to exist in your eyes, and you'll come to see and seek pleasure only in halal.
Right there lies true joy and delight.
O الله, make Iman beloved to us and beautify it in our hearts, and make kufr, wickedness, and disobedience hateful to us, and make us among the rightly guided.
its so fucked up how crochet tutorials are literally like: step 1 make a slip knot. step 2 do the triple homo back loop front loop doop da doop boopity snoop super granny lace leaf stitch 420 look ma no hands we the best hook music secret style tunisian no jutsu slamp dunk like