Mike Callahan

I Am Mike Callahan. “Growing Up, Falling in Love, and Other Terrible Things” available on Amazon and Kindle!

[Mike Callahan @IAmMikeCallahan]

“So anyways your father texes me”

[Pukicho @pukicho]

If you voted for Trump, kill yourself. I don't care if you regret your choice. You have the foresight of a gnat.

[Mike Callahan @IAmMikeCallahan]

My wife only loves me because of my positive attitude and massive hog.

[Brian Tyler Cohen @briantylercohen]

Ghislaine Maxwell lied about Trump never going to Epstein's house (directly contradicted by her email correspondence with Epstein), and she was rewarded for that lie with a transfer to a cushier prison. The coverup is happening in plain sight.

[No Lie with Brian Tyler Cohen @NoLieWithBTC]

“Nothing will be torn down.” — Karoline Leavitt

“It won’t interfere with the current building. It pays total respect to the existing building, which I’m the biggest fan of.” — Donald Trump

[BrooklynDad_Defiant!☮️ @mmpadellan]

BREAKING: trump is having a temper tantrum, ending ALL trade negotiations with Canada.

He's butthurt that they aired an ad of President Reagan that shows how dumb trump's tariffs are.

It's VERY effective.
Be a shame if it went viral. 🇺🇲🇨🇦

[Mike Callahan @IAmMikeCallahan]

BREAKING: Proponent for other people being shot, Charlie Kirk, not as big a fan of it happening to him.

[Mike Callahan @IAmMikeCallahan]

Edibles before bed is the best sleep. Why have I not been doing this my whole life?

[Mike Callahan @IAmMikeCallahan]

I should’ve gone to Philly!

[Mike Callahan @IAmMikeCallahan]

Go birds

[The Notorious J.O.V. @whotfisjovana]

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[Mike Callahan @IAmMikeCallahan]

Ladies and gentlemen Valentine’s Day is around the corner. Send this to that special man in your life.

[Mike Callahan @IAmMikeCallahan]

I get so happy when I try to make a new food and it comes out delicious. I’m truly so impressive.

[❀ @marsrled]

“act your age” damn bitch?? god forbid i exude childlike wonder??? didn’t know i had to be a tight ass

[Mike Callahan @IAmMikeCallahan]

“Reincarnation” but pronounced like a Texan saying “What in tarnation”

[Mike Callahan @IAmMikeCallahan]

Whenever I make chicken noodle soup it always becomes this Oliver Twist “please sir, I want some more” looking slop.

[Mike Callahan @IAmMikeCallahan]

So how hard do you pronounce the “meow” in “homeowner”? I worry I might be over doing it.

[Mike Callahan @IAmMikeCallahan]

Look at all these exciting colors. My life is about to get so crazy.

[Mike Callahan @IAmMikeCallahan]

I ordered some sewing thread and didn’t realize it came with sewing needles and got way overly excited when I saw them.

[The Notorious J.O.V. @whotfisjovana]

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