RYKER

WHAT A CYANIDE SURPRISE YOU HAVE LEFT FOR MY EYES!
IF I HAD COMMON SENSE I'D CUT MYSELF OR CURL UP AND DIE!

[RYKER @INCUFXCKER]

HANG ME UP BY MY NECK, 'CUZ I'M A FATE WORSE THAN DEATH!

(semi-lit MVRP/Eddsworld OC!)
(lewd jokes and dark themes/language on tl!)
(MV & MS!)
(penned by G!)

#EWRP // #MVRP // #OCRP

(OC face claim is Damien from Monster Prom, this is NOT a MonsterProm account.)

[RYKER @INCUFXCKER]

[Rapid fire texting Gretchen, only to stop.]

SERIOUSLY!? "FIGURE IT OUT"?! AAAAAAND SHE TURNED HER PHONE OFF. GREAT.

[RYKER @INCUFXCKER]

you'd believe anything I told you about what I do, so. . . maybe lets not focus on that.

[RYKER @INCUFXCKER]

Nice to meet you, Tamara. [Handshake back, also firm. He lets go after a regular amount of time.]

Yeah, the world's full of weird shit, ya know? Mirrors, huh? I knew that there was somethin' weird about them. . . I'll report that to Gretchen later. But yeah, I don't think ++

[tam @MlRRORBITCH]

Tamara Richards. friends call me Tam. You can just call me Tamara, though.

[ She grasps Ryker's hand, giving it a firm shake. ]

Eh, I've seen weirder. ever seen a guy come out of a mirror? /THAT'S/ weird.

[RYKER @INCUFXCKER]

[Oh, he wasn't joking. But-- raises a brow. May have to report this girl to Gretchen...]

Riiight, yeah, I was definitely joking!

[Smiling softly, he extends a hand.]

M'name's Ryker, Nice to meet you, albeit in these weird ass circumstances.

[tam @MlRRORBITCH]

. . . Pffft.

[ With that, Tamara laughs! a really hearty laugh, too! ]

That's a good one, man. Unfortunately, no sort of mind altering magic bullshit works on me. Sorry!

[ She wips a tear from one of her eyes‐ (can you really call them eyes...?) ]

.. Don't mention it, though.

[RYKER @INCUFXCKER]

Uhh, long story. I'd probably have to Men-in-Black your brain if I told you.

[He says, shrugging.]

Look, uhm. . . thanks for the save.

[tam @MlRRORBITCH]

[ Tamara's face scrunches up– the smell of burning flesh, no matter how familiar, is never pleasant... ]

.... The hell was that?

[RYKER @INCUFXCKER]

Sorry, lemme just...

[Awkwardly and slowly picking up the bricked doorknob to try to reassemble it onto the door.]

[Walks out.]

[𝙔𝙊𝙐𝙍 𝙒𝙊𝙉𝘿𝙀𝙍𝙁𝙐𝙇 𝘾𝙍𝙀𝘼𝙏𝙄𝙊𝙉... @W0NDERVESSEL]

He shakes his head, closing his book with a sigh.

"ADHD at its finest..."

[RYKER @INCUFXCKER]

[Poofs from human to demon.]

Sorry, gang. I--

[Looks around.]

What did I come in here for??

[𝙔𝙊𝙐𝙍 𝙒𝙊𝙉𝘿𝙀𝙍𝙁𝙐𝙇 𝘾𝙍𝙀𝘼𝙏𝙄𝙊𝙉... @W0NDERVESSEL]

Spitz literally jumps up and scrambles away as Aiden just looks up from his book.

"... Ryker."

[RYKER @INCUFXCKER]

[CRASHES IN THROUGH THE DOOR, SCARING THE EVERLOVING FUCK OUT OF SPITZ.]

[𝙔𝙊𝙐𝙍 𝙒𝙊𝙉𝘿𝙀𝙍𝙁𝙐𝙇 𝘾𝙍𝙀𝘼𝙏𝙄𝙊𝙉... @W0NDERVESSEL]

Reading.

Do not bother.

[RYKER @INCUFXCKER]

++ love to continue this conversation in this exact location, [Zombehs are approaching.] we-- can't. We have a mani/pedi we need to get to!

[Trying to play along to protect her.]

[RYKER @INCUFXCKER]

Happens to the best of us, miss.

[Wondering if there's even a safe place to bring her to wait this whole thing out at, he's grabbing his phone and looking at the map of this fucking place. . no, no, definitely not, and-- there might be a place!]

But uh, as much as I'd ++

[RYKER @INCUFXCKER]

[Head in hands.]

[RYKER @INCUFXCKER]

. . . I'm-- sorry for your loss.

[Thinks its a person.]

[RYKER @INCUFXCKER]

[Using Hellish Rebuke to turn zombehs extra crispy. Looks damn good while doin' it.]

[RYKER @INCUFXCKER]

[Pullin' up a lil closer.]

Howdy there, miss. [Hands her her own wallet.]

You left it on the counter of that Starbucks. . .so I came to give it back to you.

[He's telling the truth, even though he's covered in zombeh chunks and blood.]

[RYKER @INCUFXCKER]

[Tips sunglasses down at her. Hot guy wink.]

[RYKER @INCUFXCKER]

YOU KNOW IT, DAWG!

[𝙔𝙊𝙐𝙍 𝙒𝙊𝙉𝘿𝙀𝙍𝙁𝙐𝙇 𝘾𝙍𝙀𝘼𝙏𝙄𝙊𝙉... @W0NDERVESSEL]

Me and Ryker on a daily bloody basis:

[RYKER @INCUFXCKER]

Gretchen's on her way, she'll at least know what to do. . .

[RYKER @INCUFXCKER]

(( https://t.co/Rl70JnVy3i hee hee, gretchen acc real?

her face claim is that bitch from total drama, crimson??? idk

[RYKER @INCUFXCKER]

@DUDETTENEXTD00R (( once i find an acc, im making ew gretchen because i think she's actually a deserter from your oc's opposing army???

idk im just thinkin,,, ill chat w/ you any time about thoughts !!

[RYKER @INCUFXCKER]

@DUDETTENEXTD00R (( Ryker and Tori being platonic besties is still the best move, i agree. i just wanted to let you know you have options!! /gen