I Only Make Boys

Serving 18-26 years with three miniature sociopaths. Send help.

[I Only Make Boys @IOnlyMakeBoys]

Toddler came home w/ this note. I told his dad "you need to talk to him." He reads it & says:
'and ran away?!' Ha!!
#nohelp #biggestkidofall

[I Only Make Boys @IOnlyMakeBoys]

Village Repair WooSox Ticket Giveaway
We are giving away 2 tickets to the Woosox Opening season!
https://t.co/24mWxxckFQ

[I Only Make Boys @IOnlyMakeBoys]

@angelacserrot 6/7...6/7
10/27....10/28
4/17....4/20 longest three days of my life!

[I Only Make Boys @IOnlyMakeBoys]

@BumbleBeeszy I’m a huge fan of this game
🤷🏼‍♀️

[I Only Make Boys @IOnlyMakeBoys]

My son is watching @danieltigertv but keeps calling him “Naked Tiger.” He’s not wrong.

#putsomepantson

[I Only Make Boys @IOnlyMakeBoys]

@allfourklaus I should feel a sense of accomplishment for making to the end (well, beginning) but instead I’m disappointed at how long it took me to find the fourth clown. 🤦🏼‍♀️

[I Only Make Boys @IOnlyMakeBoys]

3 year old comes out of his room, looking deflated, and announces “my pillow is broken.”
What the hell does that even mean? Now I have to investigate.

And with that he has successfully completed Bedtime Stall Tactic No. 573.

#toddlerforthewin #parentingfail #lifewithboys

[I Only Make Boys @IOnlyMakeBoys]

@jbwardrop @Mom_Overboard Right?!?!?!?

[I Only Make Boys @IOnlyMakeBoys]

3yo: Mommy show me your muscles
Me: *flexes*
3: No stand up and do it
Me: *stands up and flexes*
3: WOW. Good job! Can I take your picture?
*raises hands to face*
Smile! 📸📸
Very nice. Wanna see?
How about a video?...

Bedtime stall tactic number 327.

#parenting #lifewithboys

[I Only Make Boys @IOnlyMakeBoys]

@OhioMomoftwo Option 5: depends on what it’s going on (egg salad can ONLY have miracle whip!)

[I Only Make Boys @IOnlyMakeBoys]

My three year old pooped in a porta potty today.

There is not enough antibac in the world to make me forget.

#parenting #lifewithboys #momlife #germseverywhere

[I Only Make Boys @IOnlyMakeBoys]

@lll_sin Raincheck? 🤞🤞

[I Only Make Boys @IOnlyMakeBoys]

We NEVER eat out but we tried the @110Grill this wkend.
35 minute wait but we were prepared with toys, games, running laps.
At minute 30 we lost # 3.😭
At minute 33 we lost # 2.😭
At minute 37 our table was ready.
We went to a drive thru instead.

#lifewithboys #thisiswhywedinein

[I Only Make Boys @IOnlyMakeBoys]

@OhioMomoftwo PS can you swap “coffee” with “wine”?

[I Only Make Boys @IOnlyMakeBoys]

@OhioMomoftwo I hope you mean it, cuz if I show up and your house and your kids are clean, I’m gonna be pissed!

[I Only Make Boys @IOnlyMakeBoys]

@sah_nursemom ....before I get to work.

[I Only Make Boys @IOnlyMakeBoys]

@daddysdigest That’s why we pay daycare an ungodly amount of money. They can do the potty training. 💰 🚽 💰

[I Only Make Boys @IOnlyMakeBoys]

@latelateshow https://t.co/uJgqYFRdMv

[I Only Make Boys @IOnlyMakeBoys]

@IrishIsRsmiling I see this is a pants-optional activity. My toddler would approve.

[I Only Make Boys @IOnlyMakeBoys]

@TwinzerDad @That1MaryAnn Looks more like you’re encouraging screen time and discouraging playtime. I approve.

[I Only Make Boys @IOnlyMakeBoys]

@OhioMomoftwo Depends. How many kids does he have? And are they all girls?