kamal

Introvert🙂
Yoruba Blood💉😉
🇳🇬
Hustler 💪

[Àgbà John Doe @jon_d_doe]

I just read two different sad and painful DMs from two young girls.

I'll share them soon.

However, I will have further conversations with them and share the update with my advice.

Really painful DMs.

End.

[kamal @Ice_cube_06]

@jon_d_doe No thanks

[Àgbà John Doe @jon_d_doe]

Never!

It leads to chronic self-neglect, deep resentment, and anxiety.

Constantly seeking out validation from people to avoid conflicts, or being ignored.

You'd lose your sense of identity, if you keep doing this.

End.

[Àgbà John Doe @jon_d_doe]

I'm speaking for myself.

Before I would listen to any marital advice from anyone (online or offline), he or she must have been married for at least 20 years.

I may not accept the advice, but I would listen.

End.

[Àgbà John Doe @jon_d_doe]

Meanwhile on the backup page, there is a 27 year old lady that posted her picture during one of those threads that I did for single women.

According to her, of all the men that contacted her, only one stood out for her.

A divorced man living in the UK.

They have not met physically, & have been "dating" for 10 months.

She says that she's sex starved, and that the man just recently got his COS and awaiting visa approval.

Man told her that he wouldn't want them to be living together in the UK if they get married.

And that he would only be returning home to Nigeria for 30 days in one year.

You see...

Some of you ladies don't have sense.

And may your ojúkòkòrò not be your undoing.

You wasted 10 months from when you were 26 to becoming 27, waiting and hoping to meet the "LOYL" and hope to escape poverty through him.

"He was the only man that stood out for me amongst the rest".

Some ladies who decided not to be greedy or stupid, have used the opportunity that I created for them to find their husbands.

One is getting married next month.

You're there, building castles in the air and collecting pounds stipends.

All those men that you rejected because of "UK", quite a number of them would have found other ladies, and are going to marry them soon.

Keep fooling around.

End.

[Àgbà John Doe @jon_d_doe]

Asides raising children, there is nothing else my lovely wife is doing now, that she did not do as a girlfriend.

Marrying her was just a formality.

She was my wife way before I married her.

She washed my clothes.

She cooked for me.

She cleaned my home.

She fucked me to oblivion.

She made me feel married before I married her.

And above all, she didn't ask me for a dime for whatever she was doing.

There are two things in this story that I would love men to learn from.

1) if you have a woman who does all these things for you as a boyfriend, please plan to marry her.

2) if she's doing all these for you, and demanding that you must pay her for them, you may wish to reconsider your decision.

Always remember:

If her intentions are good, she's doing them because she wants you to be a responsible husband who would go all out to provide her and the children that she would have for you.

You must spot her as a man, learn to accept and tolerate her imperfections.

And be able to discern which of the numerous ladies that is doing what she's doing with a good heart and goof intentions.

That's when you'd know that you have found your wife.

Pray to God for wisdom.

End.

[Nandkishor @devops_nk]

Age 25–30 is the weirdest phase of life.

- Friends are getting married
- Someone is buying a new home
- Someone is still struggling to even begin
- Someone is earning well and “settled”
- Parents are getting older every year
- Responsibilities increase silently
- Comparison becomes unavoidable
- Nights are full of overthinking
- Dreams feel expensive
- Time feels faster

- You smile in public.
- You fight battles in silence.
- You question your worth at 2 AM.
- You’re not lazy.
- You’re not failing.
- You’re just carrying too much alone.

If you’re in this phase please be gentle with yourself.
You’re trying. And that matters.

Are you also feeling this ? ✋

[Àgbà John Doe @jon_d_doe]

A married woman is in my DM.

She just found out that her husband got her married best friend pregnant, and she aborted it.

Her best friend was her chief brides maid.

She hasn't confronted her best friend yet.

Her husband is pleading with her to forgive him.

She wants to expose her best friend to her husband and possibly destroy her marriage.

And she can no longer maintain the friendship. If she doesn't keep up with the friendship, her best friend would suspect something is wrong.

The husband is asking her to pretend not to know, but she is finding that option difficult to take.

She doesn't want to leave her marriage, either.

And now she's asking me for advice.

To be honest, I am lost for words on how to advice her.

I need your help.

End.

[Àgbà John Doe @jon_d_doe]

Most men are going to enjoy the fruit of their labor for 10-20 years old.

Typically, from age 60.

At that time, it would mostly be your investments or retirement benefits that will sustain you.

If you think that your children would go over and beyond to take care of you, you may not be as blessed ooo.

Some of your children would wish that you die sooner.

So that they can close your chapter.

Marry early, & face your challenges now.

And plan for your old age, should your children abandon you.

Your wife may not be abandoned.

But you....

I am sorry.

End.

[Àgbà John Doe @jon_d_doe]

Some of you, the only time that you receive a call from your siblings or relatives, is when they want to ask you for financial help.

They don't just randomly call you, to say that they want to check on your wellbeing.

I will excuse your parents or guardians in this thread.

They're your parents, and you're supposed to be the one calling them, far more than they should be calling you.

As a young man or woman in a relationship.

This is something alot of you may be taking for granted, or have not paid close attention to.

It's not good to be emotionally lonely, when you're building your life or career.

You need that one person that you'd call to speak to, at least once a day or in few days.

Someone you can trust a great deal, & someone that is building with you.

Someone that you'd share your good news with, when you pass that professional exam, or you achieve a major task in your life.

Typically, this period is between the ages of 26 to 30.

I need every young legitimate hardworking man or woman to think critically about this.

Yesterday, I said that most married women who are happy in their marriage, are the ones that met their husbands when they had nothing significant to their name.

And it's true for the most part.

A lot of things can happen in marriage that, if your spouse is not someone that you started life with, & knew him or her to a very large extent, you'd not have patience, or you'd not be so kind to him or her.

Learn not to ruin your young relationship with greed, unnecessary pride or deceits.

Learn that the young girl that you're dating today, & you think she's not beautiful or classy enough for you, is also growing.

And that she will not be like that forever.

Diamonds are not shinny when they're first discovered.

As a young man living alone & working hard, you need a girlfriend.

She's mostly going to be the only one that would be buzzing your phones everyday, & waking you up with loving messages.

You also need someone that can quickly help you reach out to your family, should anything happen to you.

If you keep staying alone, & saying that you don't need a girlfriend because you're "chasing the bag", you'll not understand what it means to have a wife as soon as possible.

And before you know it, you're in your 30s, & now too busy to even date properly.

You'll find yourself doing what you should have done long ago.

And marriage will start to scare you, because almost every lady that you'd meet will want to leech on you, & you may not even be able to trust them.

For you young ladies, my honest prayer for you is that when you genuinely want to commit to a man, may God not bring a deceitful and greedy man your way.

Because some men do not even know what they want.

Just vibes and inshallah with coins in their pockets.

Thinking that they have arrived.

Once you sense that he is not leading you right, lies unprovoked, a bet addict, a fraudster & doesn't speak like someone who wants to marry a wife early, please stop wasting your time with him.

Leave his stupid life alone, & look for responsible men elsewhere.

Let oloshos deal with him.

End.

[Àgbà John Doe @jon_d_doe]

I have a very important advice to give to young single men.

Some of you in this generation are very lucky to meet young girls who do not mind to be in a relationship with you, despite you not being financially okay.

Please do not use your insecurities to chase the girls away.

Stop comparing yourselves with your male friends that are better than you financially, & are in a relationship.

Do not tell any young girl that is interested in being with you, that you're not in the right place (financially) to be in a relationship with her.

Let her be the one to say that, or take a walk, if she is not okay being in a relationship with you, because you're broke.

As long as you're not lazy, you're chasing your goals, & you know that your future is going to be okay, please keep giving her hope.

Always remember, women have the gift of foresight.

When a woman decides to be with you, despite being broke, she's not saying that she is happy with you being broke.

She's saying that she's happy with where she sees that you're headed.

She wants to invest in you, sacrifice for you, and build with you.

As long as you do not make her feel "ugly", non attractive, or you're comparing her with other girls that are obviously looking better than she is, she'll be happy with being with you.

If you're arrogant, too judgemental and making her feel low, she'll start to consider better options, to prove to you that she's capable of being like those girls, and this will make her cheat on you.

Do not assume that because you're not giving her money, then another man is giving her money, until she proves you otherwise.

As long as she's living within her verifiable means, please appreciate her and work hard to give her the life that she has dreamt for both of you.

This was what I did.

I was able to sustain my relationship for 9 years because I didn't feel insecure, and I didn't push my lovely wife away.

2 years before I married her, suitors were coming. But I had already secured a good job, and she gave none of them a listening ear.

Her sacrifices and patience paid off.

My little wisdom and hardwork and dedication paid off too.

And we became husband and wife.

As long as you're focused, and as long as you have a solid girlfriend behind you, you'll come out of that stage of uncertainty, & both of you will look back to your days of humble beginnings.

Please stop feeling insecure.

Stop thinking that you do not deserve to be in a relationship because you're broke.

You do.

You have a dick.

You have a brain.

You're legit.

You're hardworking.

It's just a matter of time.

End.

[Àgbà John Doe @jon_d_doe]

End.

[Àgbà John Doe @jon_d_doe]

I have a very strong belief, but you don't have to agree with me.

If you work hard as a man to take good care of your wife, provide for her for the most part, & treat her with kindness.

You'll most always succeed in whatever you do.

But if she's a bad wife to you, despite doing all those.

You'll struggle badly, until she leaves your home.

The day you choose your wife, you have chosen your destiny.

End.

[Instablog9ja @instablog9ja]

“Choosing a Good Mother Matters More Than Beauty” — Man-to-Man Advice Sparks Marriage Values Debate 💍🧠

[YabaLeftOnline @yabaleftonline]

"In all thy getting, aspire to get a partner" – Lady admonishes young people

[Àgbà John Doe @jon_d_doe]

When I advised young single men in serious relationship that, it's better for them to cheat with a prostitute, than to cheat with another lady that is also looking for a husband, some of you may have thought the advise was improper.

I can't advice men not to cheat, because I am a man. And I know that most men will never take that advice.

And it will be hypocritical of me to even do that.

So what do I do?

It's to advice them to be careful.

You have a serious relationship. You know this is the girl that you want to marry. You know that you're a potential bachelor because life is beginning to take good shape for you, & your future is bright.

Which lady would see potentials in you, and would not want to try to win you over?

She may act foolishly, and that is your weakest link.

Even if you want to cheat with her, why not use a condom to avoid things like either STIs or STDs or pregnancy?

You must protect your relationship, & not let another lady that you do not want to marry, ruin things for you.

Relationship takes time to build. Your commitment towards a lady takes time for you to give it.

And if you have secured yourself a good woman for you, please use your sense, & protect your future wife from hurt, betrayal and disappointment.

Yes, you may not marry the lady that deliberately got pregnant for you, but she will be carrying your child.

Would you throw the baby away with the bath water?

And even if you serious girlfriend decides not to leave you, and you eventually marry her, she'll be nursing that hurt for many years.

She'll continue to use it to torment your peace, & she may not love that innocent child.

And you can't blame her.

You deprived her of her right to bear your first child.

Which is every woman's innermost wish & dream.

Your marrying her or making her your wife won't automatically erase that betrayal.

I hope you all take this counsel seriously.

End.

[Àgbà John Doe @jon_d_doe]

Omo ehhh 🙆‍♂️🙆‍♂️🙆‍♂️

[Àgbà John Doe @jon_d_doe]

If you're driving a Corolla, a woman driving a Benz is not on your level.

She's bigger than you.

Even if a man bought the Benz for her.

Go & date & marry your level.

All women have a toto.

And it takes only water to keep their toto clean.

Water is cheap.

End.

[Àgbà John Doe @jon_d_doe]

Honestly, I agree with you.

Sincere dating requires hardwork.

And I think I would like to admonish men more, on this.

If you meet a lady that you're convinced is not cheating on you, she's respectful, have few friends, please take her seriously.

And plan to marry her.

End.