Illuminati Inc.

World domination is serious business.

[Illuminati Inc. @Illuminati_Inc]

Well. Fuck.

[Illuminati Inc. @Illuminati_Inc]

@AllisonLCarter We have you registered for our monthly Networking mixer, but you don’t qualify for reservations at The Table™️.

[Illuminati Inc. @Illuminati_Inc]

None of this shit would be happening if we were still charge. #justsaying

[Illuminati Inc. @Illuminati_Inc]

The fact that our President can read is now a source of optimism and celebration.

[Illuminati Inc. @Illuminati_Inc]

The fact that he finished the whole speech, from a Teleprompter, and didn't go 'off message' was lauded as a 'slam dunk'.

[Illuminati Inc. @Illuminati_Inc]

So, our standards are low enough now that the President's ability to read a speech - from a teleprompter, is news.

Just the act of reading

[Illuminati Inc. @Illuminati_Inc]

@about_a_bot Shit bro, that was 4 months ago.

[Literate Gamer @LiterateGamer]

Me: I'm good at video games.

Nioh: *ahem*

Me: YOU SHUT YOUR FACE!

[Illuminati Inc. @Illuminati_Inc]

To be fair, the kids aren't going to need those schools anyway, considering how much lead in the water is suddenly going to be 'acceptable'

[Illuminati Inc. @Illuminati_Inc]

#DrOzforSurgeonGeneral

[Illuminati Inc. @Illuminati_Inc]

Fuck it.

If you find yourself falling into madness, you may as well dive.

Dr. Oz for Surgeon General!

[Illuminati Inc. @Illuminati_Inc]

Holy shit.

That could actually happen.

He could actually appoint Dr. Oz as Surgeon General.

[Illuminati Inc. @Illuminati_Inc]

Why stop with Betsy DeVos?

Lets nominate a homeopathic 'practitioner' the Surgeon General.

[Illuminati Inc. @Illuminati_Inc]

Betsy DeVos just bought the Secretary of Education position.

Very literally. For less than a million dollars. This is the receipt. https://t.co/ZUFmBAspKh

[George D. @xdelmar59]

She literally paid everyone in the room
#noDevos

[Illuminati Inc. @Illuminati_Inc]

Betsy DeVos as Sec. of Education makes about as much sense as Richard Dawkins as the Archbishop of Canterbury.

[Illuminati Inc. @Illuminati_Inc]

This podcast is lit fam. https://t.co/7nMgFXbh0h

[Literate Gamer @LiterateGamer]

So what 'Premium' Content would you be most interested in for our coming Patreon offerings (each would be 1 a month)

VOTE

[Illuminati Inc. @Illuminati_Inc]

I think @LadyGaga was the real MVP of last night's game

Without that Satanic ritual, the Patriots never could have pulled that off comeback

[Illuminati Inc. @Illuminati_Inc]

#AnxietyIn5Words

We aren't actually in control.

[Illuminati Inc. @Illuminati_Inc]

@KenmuHellkyuu Still not funny, but I'm trying.

[Illuminati Inc. @Illuminati_Inc]

Fuck.

Kellyanne Conway let our Bowling Green Massacre plans slip.

Well, so much for the season 2 twist!

[Illuminati Inc. @Illuminati_Inc]

We'll confirm that.
#2spooky4me https://t.co/etPEqSALuv