Bob Green

I’m Bob Green, CEO of Frazier Foods, Buena Park. We also deliver a load of meat to Ted Bell at Ted’s of Beverly Hills weekly

[Bob Green @ImBobGreen]

I’m going to be using the lyrics to Talk Talk’s great song “It’s My Life” in future advertising. How does this sound as you enter the store? You hear me singing “I’m Bob Green. Don’t you forget it!”
I don’t know. Now that I see it in print, I suddenly have urgent gas pains

[Bob Green @ImBobGreen]

He proudly told me that he waited for his labrador to take its afternoon dump, put on rubber gloves, scooped it up, saw that the door to my Benz opened and carefully put the turds right there on my seat. He was waiting with his camera and caught my reaction. Yes, I screamed. K?

[Bob Green @ImBobGreen]

Yesterday as I sat down in the seat of my S Class Benz, I felt something warm then wet. Any guesses? Yessir. Brand new dog sh*t…put there by assistant manager Sean Blanda because I embarrassed him by pointing out he left blank spaces on the store advert app.
So f***ing what?!

[Bob Green @ImBobGreen]

Come on in to Frazier Foods! Today we have ________ half off and a dozen ________ are only $________ with the Frazier Foods “I’m Bob Green” coupon*
* apologies Sean Blanda assistant manager didn’t fill in those blanks. I guess Sean was shooting blanks eh? 😂😂😂😂😂😂😂

[Bob Green @ImBobGreen]

You’ll notice that I have changed my username to @ImBobGreen. I think that’s much better because I’m the guy that runs Frasier Foods, Bob Green’s Meats and Greens, and basically I run sh*t up in here. You just live here.
Sorry I’m in a bad mood.

[Bob Green @ImBobGreen]

Smell of urine this morning on our new “Bob’s Home” image above entrance to the Buena Park Park store. My face. It’s admirable someone climbed up 12 feet to the roof ledge, aimed at the mouth on the image (mine) and rocketed a stream of piss right at..let’s be honest …my mouth

[Bob Green @ImBobGreen]

I’m bringing back “Bob’s Home” to freshen up the Frazier Foods brand. Get business pumping again. I’m going to have this image of me, Bob Green, mounted above the entrance to each store to remind people of our old slogan, “Bob’s home.” It’ll say that above my face: “Bob’s Home.”

[Bob Green @ImBobGreen]

Frasier Foods with great picnic ideas! Buy cold cuts, a loaf of bread, mayo and mustard. Put the cold cuts between slices of bread, then spread on mayo and mustard. There, eat that. Sorry. In a bad mood. Lost a shit pot load of money playing god damned dog shit bitch poker

[Bob Green @ImBobGreen]

Looking forward to the summer? At Fraser foods we’ve got your picnic fixings.* Come on in, try not to steal anything. Joking!!! Frasier Foods customers are honest. I guess.
*I refuse to spell it “fixins ’” I’m not a hillbilly with a two knuckles deep finger in my nose. Not yet.

[Bob Green @ImBobGreen]

I took money I made off the “I deliver my load of meat to Ted Bell” prank and pissed it away selling the Frazier Foods brand cheap, then started the Bob Green’s Meats and Greens turd. So then I had to buy the brand back at a loss. And I’m here, Mr April, dumbf*ck of the month

[Bob Green @ImBobGreen]

When I had a serious concern about customers in my stores saying “all y’all….” and I expressed that to Mr Hendrie, he posted this picture of a “yawl.” A type of sail boat. Because he thought he’d be take my concern about people going hillbilly and make a joke out of it

[Bob Green @ImBobGreen]

Hi, Bob Green here, fresh from voluntary psychiatric evaluation at the Sweet Farm B & B with this thought. What do you think when you hear someone say “all y’all.” As in “all of you”? Because, funny thing, it kind of pisses me off to hear it in one of my stores. Okay. I’m done

[Bob Green @ImBobGreen]

He hires a plane to fly over my Buena Park store while dragging a sign that says “Happy 60th Birthday to Knob Green.” Guess what ? I’m 55. And the only “knob” in the conversation would be Flanagan. A complete, fully vetted knob.

[Bob Green @ImBobGreen]

It’s not like me, Bob Green, owner and founder of Frazier Foods and Bob Green’s Meats and Greens to use obscenities like (be forewarned, I’m going to use one) fuck. But I’ve been subjected to ongoing abuse, much of it anonymous but none the less authored by Mr Miles Flanagan 1/2

[Bob Green @ImBobGreen]

Remember when this place used to be Twitter and it had interesting people and unpredictable kinds of conversations and it wasn’t run by this guy Muss or whatever the fuck his name is. See I got 💰 too. See? Maybe not as much as this guy Muk but enough. You know? Enough

[Bob Green @ImBobGreen]

Sample copy from new print ad: “Come on into Frazier Foods/Bob Green’s Meats and Greens. Get top quality meats and greens at Bob Green’s Greens and Meats inside Frazier Foods.” Aw f***! I mean “Bob Green’s Meat and Greens.” F*** your mother!! I MEAN Boob Green’s MEATs and GREENs

[Bob Green @ImBobGreen]

That is so much horse stuff. You came to me, said you wanted to take a sailboat cruise of the Mediterranean but Frank needed emotional coaxing? And I had just told you that I found your ass attractive and you said ..and I may be wrong….but I heard you say “you know what to do.”

[♥ Margaret Grey ♥ @MargaretGrey]

Not gonna work, Bob. I had nothing whatsoever to do with you kidnapping me, holding me hostage (and now I’ll tell the people the truth) and holding a salad fork to my throat. Doesn’t sound that scary. Believe me, it was.

[Bob Green @ImBobGreen]

And as has often been the case in my life, I wind up standing center stage with a large wet spot near the crotch of my pants, cream pie dripping off of the chin and people waving, saying “rotsa ruck suckaaaa.!”

[Bob Green @ImBobGreen]

I am Robert Green of Frazier Foods/Bob’s Meats and Greens. What I am saying, I say of my own volition. I recognize that my story about kidnapping Margaret Grey being the result of my attraction to her (forgive my language) “ass” has spread confusion, anger, and misinformation….

[Bob Green @ImBobGreen]

I’ll just say this. A certain individual desired a trip to Asia, a vacation, and had been unable to talk their spouse into paying for it. This hostage drama was supposed to induce sympathy, and then a desire to pay for this person’s vacation in Bali or somewhere I don’t know.