Connor Whitlock

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[Connor Whitlock @InsiderWhitlock]

Christian McCaffrey (enriched with souls of the fallen) has been upgraded to "Definitely" for 49ers training camp.

[Connor Whitlock @InsiderWhitlock]

The Dark Lord fired a warning shot across the 49ers’ bow this week, sending Ricky Pearsall back to the Gulag and making it clear Kyle Shanahan’s self sacrifice has been rejected.

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I thought Tony Romo answered all the police officers' questions brilliantly. He's getting a raw deal

#FreeRomo

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You have to hand it to the Falcons.

Two years ago, they signed a 35 year old quarterback coming off a torn Achilles, so they drafted another QB in the first round.

A year later, they dumped the Achilles guy and signed a different former 1st round QB.

Now, in 2026, they have one QB who’s a hit away from recording an album with Antonio Brown and another who no longer has knees.

[Connor Whitlock @InsiderWhitlock]

Of the injuries Kyle Shanahan suffered in the crash, doctors say “Zendaya and Tom Holland fatigue” poses the greatest threat to his ability to coach this season.

[Connor Whitlock @InsiderWhitlock]

“I don’t want to throw Drake under the bus. Buses are slow. I threw Jalen under several buses, but he kept getting away because the buses simply weren’t fast enough.

Drake is younger. Not necessarily faster, but craftier. I’m going to need a much faster vehicle if I plan on throwing guys under it here.

Sorry, I’m rambling. Happy to be here.”

[Connor Whitlock @InsiderWhitlock]

Mack Hollins arrives at training camp barefoot, holding chinchillas. Says he breeds and eats only chinchillas now or some shit.

I don’t know. Fuck this guy.

[Connor Whitlock @InsiderWhitlock]

Kyle Shanahan assured fans that his car accident was merely a sacrifice to “protect his players” from the Dark Lord, whose bloodlust he hopes has finally been satisfied enough to spare half the 49ers’ roster from IR this season.

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The Cardinals and Jacoby Brissett have agreed to a reworked contract that gives Brissett more guaranteed money in exchange for playing quarterback badly enough to guarantee Arizona can draft someone that isn't Jacoby Brissett.

[Connor Whitlock @InsiderWhitlock]

Tony Romo told reporters he’s as shocked as anyone that this is his first DUI.

“I’m 46 years old. I’ve been day drinking since I was 16. 30 years is a hell of a run.”

[Connor Whitlock @InsiderWhitlock]

Most people forget Macho Man Randy Savage's first stage name: Wrestling Man Randall Reserved

[Connor Whitlock @InsiderWhitlock]

The Ravens insist they didn’t cut Diego Pavia solely because of how hilarious he looked once they saw him in full pads.

They did admit it was a factor.

[Connor Whitlock @InsiderWhitlock]

Chiefs Concerned After Andy Reid Shows Up to Camp 300 Pounds Under Target Weight

[Connor Whitlock @InsiderWhitlock]

Messi says Argentina “didn’t want to engage Spain in a football match,” fearing it might play directly into Spain’s hands.

[Connor Whitlock @InsiderWhitlock]

Madonna was joined by Ronaldinho, Ronaldo, and Rashee Rice for the WC halftime show.

[Connor Whitlock @InsiderWhitlock]

Zlatan Unveils Hand drawn Portrait of Lalas During Emotional World Cup Sign-Off

[Connor Whitlock @InsiderWhitlock]

Antonio Brown and Brandon Aiyuk's new rap duo, ABBA, is already facing legal threats after announcing their debut single, "Take a Chance on Me."

[Connor Whitlock @InsiderWhitlock]

Vikings kicker Will Reichard has reportedly been asked by HR to stop showering around rookies after several claimed it was creating a "hostile work environment."

[Connor Whitlock @InsiderWhitlock]

Fernando Mendoza Turns Heads at Raiders Media Event With Big Tiddy Goth Girlfriend

[Connor Whitlock @InsiderWhitlock]

Harry Kane says he has "zero regrets" about England taking Viagra to prepare for Mexico City's altitude, adding that the 4 hour flight to Miami afterward "created a squad chemistry we'll never tell our wives about."