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Dad Jokes
@ItsDadJokes
I'm Dad.
Worldwide
Joined August 2012
520
Following
5.5K
Followers
15
Posts
Dad Jokes
@ItsDadJokes
over 11 years ago
What did the pirate say on his 80th birthday? Aye matey!
Dad Jokes
@ItsDadJokes
over 11 years ago
What's this movie about? It's about 2 hours.
ItsDadJokes
retweeted
Ron Swanson
@Sir_Ron_Swanson
over 11 years ago
"Either you like bacon or you're wrong." Psalm 117:102
Dad Jokes
@ItsDadJokes
over 11 years ago
Where does Fonzie go for lunch? Chick-Fil-Eyyyyyyyyy
Who to follow
Steve Levy
@espnSteveLevy
Unofficial, official voice of @TheBahamasBowl. I have 1 foul to give. Lucky dad of 3 VIPs.
vishal dayama
@VishalDayama
founder- @braindaddotco . writer. director. advertiser. grandfather. enjoyer of all kinds of sports. SuperDM me for enquiries.
BikeLA
@heybikela
BikeLA - formerly LA County Bicycle Coalition (LACBC) - works to make all communities in LA County healthy, safe, & fun places to ride a bike.
Dad Jokes
@ItsDadJokes
over 11 years ago
I've told you a million times not to exaggerate!
Dad Jokes
@ItsDadJokes
over 11 years ago
Are you alright? No, I'm half left.
Dad Jokes
@ItsDadJokes
over 11 years ago
Why do so many people with laser hair want to get it removed?
Dad Jokes
@ItsDadJokes
over 11 years ago
Why can't you have a nose 12 inches long? Because then it would be a foot.
Dad Jokes
@ItsDadJokes
over 11 years ago
I bought some shoes from a drug dealer. I don’t know what he laced them with, but I’ve been tripping all day.
Dad Jokes
@ItsDadJokes
over 11 years ago
What did the buffalo say to his son when he left for college? Bison.
Dad Jokes
@ItsDadJokes
over 11 years ago
This was the highlight of my day!
Dad Jokes
@ItsDadJokes
over 11 years ago
How do you make antifreeze? Steal her blanket!
Dad Jokes
@ItsDadJokes
over 11 years ago
Did you get a hair cut? No, I got all of them cut!
Dad Jokes
@ItsDadJokes
over 11 years ago
I love elevator jokes. They work on so many levels.
Dad Jokes
@ItsDadJokes
over 11 years ago
I'm Hungry. Hi Hungry. I'm Dad.
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