Mel•🍍•Flo

•unsupervised and definitely UNCENSORED•

[Community Notes & Violations @CNviolations]

🔥Top 8 BRUTAL comebacks that will trigger some snowflakes

🧵A thread

1.

[Mel•🍍•Flo @ItsMelFlo]

Trying to remember where you put something when you were pregnant<<
Trying to find said thing months later<<<<

[Mel•🍍•Flo @ItsMelFlo]

“I made this on the traeger.” Bro Idgaf if you made it on a hookers ass, is it good or nah?

[Mel•🍍•Flo @ItsMelFlo]

How do you actually stop loving someone you see every. Single. Day.

I’ll tell you how. YOU become selfish.

[Mel•🍍•Flo @ItsMelFlo]

Oh shit. Home gym? Guess so. #LEGDAYANYDAY

[Mel•🍍•Flo @ItsMelFlo]

Today a girl at the gym AND guy, complimented on my “ripped calves” and then got mad when I said “I don’t do any calf specific moves-just really good genetics. 🤷🏽‍♀️ like they just looked and walked away.
I know body of a god-from the ass down.

[Mel•🍍•Flo @ItsMelFlo]

Wasn’t it a week ago we were told they were running low on ammo….. 🤔

[Chuck Callesto @ChuckCallesto]

JUST IN: Video emerges of Ukrainian soldier shooting up a gym in Donbass wearing what looks like an American flag patch..

WHY ARE THEY WEARING AMERICAN COLORS?

[Mel•🍍•Flo @ItsMelFlo]

Hey, @BWWings your St. George, Ut location sucks! I love getting a Togo container for my food and it arrives as such. Too bad I’m allergic to cilantro and that’s what I asked not to be in there. And there it is.

Your Vegas blvd location 💯 tho

[Mel•🍍•Flo @ItsMelFlo]

Unpopular opinion, Dr Percy’s death in Greys is by far sadder then Derek’s.

[Mel•🍍•Flo @ItsMelFlo]

Let’s also talk about how I was hoping to get fired that day. 😂

[Mel•🍍•Flo @ItsMelFlo]

2022 Mel had the audacity to tell her boss to “f*cking fire my ass then!” After being written up. And then being told “I can’t afford to do that.” Then she walked out the room.

2023 Mel wishes the bar wasn’t set so high.

[Mel•🍍•Flo @ItsMelFlo]

What’s sad is that some of us don’t know what having a full cup is like, because we’re constantly filling up others. 🥛

[Mel•🍍•Flo @ItsMelFlo]

If you didn’t tear up while watching Radio, you’re a liar.

[Mel•🍍•Flo @ItsMelFlo]

@H1DE_R @elonmusk Tell me you’re bad at math without telling me you’re bad at math….

[Mel•🍍•Flo @ItsMelFlo]

You guys 🥹 I just love this guy. I met him at such a low point in my life and now, I STILL get butterflies when he texts me. *even if it’s him telling me he’s going poop*

[Mel•🍍•Flo @ItsMelFlo]

@YoEthanYoung Bro. Your graduating class had <20 yeah?

[Mel•🍍•Flo @ItsMelFlo]

@merflorence @KUTV2News @Intermountain @GinnaRoeKUTV Yeah. Anything to pad those numbers.

[Mel•🍍•Flo @ItsMelFlo]

@clloydie_14 As long as it’s not a honey flavored one. Those are the worst.

[Mel•🍍•Flo @ItsMelFlo]

@FreddysUSA apparently when you ask for no mustard you get no cares either...

[Mel•🍍•Flo @ItsMelFlo]

Time. What we need more of. What we spend the most of. What we never know when ours will run out.