Maui-wowie

Just your average cEDH player and FFXIV healer. Member of @big_guava_games

[Maui-wowie @ItsTheSunbro]

Jim Cantore dictates where the hurricane will hit… Waffle House dictates the strength. These are the official metrics of the Florida man. More at 8.

[Magic: The Gathering @wizards_magic]

Our third set of the year is a return to a fan-favorite plane under siege.

Kamigawa: Titanbreach releases June 4th! #MTGKamigawa

[Adam Analysis @adamemedia1]

Americans realising their president is so corrupt he publicly announces his insider trading schemes.

[Jared Gilman @realJaredGilman]

“odyssey this” “odyssey that” u odyssey a therapist

[Aes🇺🇸 @AesPolitics1]

Dude got beat so hard that he has to go on national tv 6 years later and yap and cry like a bitch about it

[derek guy @dieworkwear]

invested all my money in argentinian pesos, bitcoin, and spacex stock earlier this year. excited to look my portfolio as i sit down with this delicious salad from taylor farms.

[Elle @HoldTheElle]

yooooo why does The Jolly Balloon Man lowkey look like hes blowin up Charlie Kirk

[AtnsMDX @AtnsXBT]

suicune was so beautiful in pokemon crystal, pls nintendo bring them on switch.

[NOBUNAGA🇯🇵🏯_夏樹蒼依 @japan_nobunaga]

In America I ordered a milkshake and the young man turned it upside down over my head.

I did not move. A samurai does not flinch, even when the ice cream is above him and gravity is the law.

Nothing fell.

The cup hung there, upside down, defying the sky, and the boy held it over me with the calm of a man who has done this ten thousand times and buried his fear long ago.

This is the Blizzard. This is Dairy Queen.

If it falls, they told me, you get it free.

I understood at once. This was not dessert. This was an ordeal.

The boy was not showing off. He was swearing an oath, with his own arm, that he had made the thing thick enough to hang against the earth, and he was betting the price of it on his honor.

The flip is not a trick.

It is a vow.

In my land a smith proved his blade by cutting.

Here a boy of seventeen proves his by turning it over a stranger's head and looking him in the eye while the whole line waits to see if he lied.

He did not lie.

He set it upright, handed it to me, and said "there you go, man," then turned to the next customer as if he had not just gambled his good name across a counter.

I tipped him everything in my pocket.

He tried to give it back. He said it was just a Blizzard.

I told him it was not just a Blizzard.

I could not explain the rest in English, and there was a line, and he was busy.

So I bowed instead.

He said, "You too, man."

That answered nothing I had said.

It answered everything I had felt.

[kar @bustitopen420]

the air quality sucks, the food gives you explosive diarrhea, we have no public transport, medical care is unaffordable, they’re tearing down forests to build AI data centers and I still have to clock in for work

[Zweil @somethings_awry]

clocking in

[Timmy_Turner @UthmanMusaYusuf]

When I'm completely burnt out, but i still have to work because i need the money to live

[Maui-wowie @ItsTheSunbro]

I’m sorry, is that fucking @DillonFrancis !?!?

[Emberville @EmbervilleGame]

We are DELIGHTED💖,
over-the-moon🌛,
ESTATIC 🎉,
(did we say delighted already?)
to introduce to you Emberville's FULL VOICE CAST!

Speechless, enamored, humbled by the sheer talent involved in this game!

[pamela ☁️☀️🛸 @tisthepamseason]

anyone wanna come over? i’m making pillsbury glass bread, parasite lettuce caesar salad, and screwworm steak for dinner 💕

[Covie @covie_93]

The people who promised to 'Make America Healthy Again' have given America:

The worst measles outbreak since 1991
The worst screwworm outbreak in 60 years
The worst cyclosporiasis outbreak in years

[𝕾𝖎𝖓 𝕰𝖒𝖔𝖈𝖎ó𝖓 🇬🇭🤝🏿🇨🇻 @GhanaianSavage]

JuSt WoRk HarDeR

[Shé/Riri 🇨🇲 Semi IA...💭 ☆ SIH 💜 @riri_zui]

y'all deadass got me rooting for the colonizer

[derek guy @dieworkwear]

some of you are testing for low T when you need to get tested for low IQ

[one dozen rats at a keyboard @PanasonicDX4500]

Spain-Argentina is the first World Cup “Colonizer vs Colonized” match that makes me say “well, let’s consider the nuances”

[Boring_Business @BoringBiz_]

Just looked at the date this was posted