Jonathan Lance

NOT a pompous, self-proclaimed PR/social media expert/guru/blowhard — YET. But, that is how I earn my scratch.

[Not Real Donald Trump @RealDonalDrumpf]

I’m asking all my #QAnons to ignore this #GOPPedoRing video by @MeidasTouch and do what Gym Jordan would do when informed about rampant sexual abuse: LOOK THE OTHER WAY! Thank you.

[Not Real Donald Trump @RealDonalDrumpf]

Many people are saying they hate #TedAndLindsey but now, thanks to Randy Rainbow, they are singing it too! DO NOT RETWEAT!

[Ted Lieu @tedlieu]

Dear @RepJeffDuncan: You are trying to use governmental power to punish a private business because you disagree with its views. Don’t you and other @GOP legislators ever lecture anyone on #CancelCulture ever again. Hypocrite.

[Not Real Donald Trump @RealDonalDrumpf]

Many people are saying #MattGaetzIsAPervert.

But because he is too young to join my #AgingPervertClub, I have suggested he start a #YoungPervertsSociety. https://t.co/Pwd044YzG5

[Mike Pence - Professional Mannequin @vespertilioAJR]

I'm not a conspiracy theorist, but:

- Someone is carefully leaking details about Matt Gaetz
- He was being investigated by Barr and Trump obviously knew
- #RonDeathSantis would pick the replacement if Gaetz resigns
- Ivanka Trump wants a seat in Congress

[Not Real Donald Trump @RealDonalDrumpf]

Matt who? https://t.co/flCowu9c2P

[Not Real Donald Trump @RealDonalDrumpf]

"Kinky" Matt Gaetz is just a low-level grifter who only traveled with me on Air Force One once or maybe 17 or 32 times! We only ever talked about adoptions!

[Not Real Donald Trump @RealDonalDrumpf]

Rep. Jim Jordan says he believes #KinkyMatt!

[Dana Goldberg @DGComedy]

Matt Gaetz is like the Eric Trump of Jeffrey Epsteins.

[Mike Pence - Professional Mannequin @vespertilioAJR]

For a party which claims to despise pedophiles, the GQP sure seems to be stacked with them.

[Not Real Donald Trump @RealDonalDrumpf]

What’s the point of going to Wyoming to troll Liz Cheney if you can’t bring a couple of Sugar Babies across state lines to party with you?????

[Not Real Donald Trump @RealDonalDrumpf]

The Apprentice.

[Woke Former Senator @WokeMitt]

The fact that Matt Gaetz is one of the most prominent members of the Republican Party tells you all you need to know about the current state of the Republican Party.

[Mike Pence - Professional Mannequin @vespertilioAJR]

You know #MattGaetzIsInTrouble when the likes of Jim Jordan and Jenna Ellis rush to his defense.

[Not Real Donald Trump @RealDonalDrumpf]

Jim Jordan has given a very strong and powerful endorsement for my good friend Rick Gaetz! Nobody is better than Gym Jordan at being confronted with the clear evidence of sexual abuse and looking the other way. #PizzaGaetz #GaetzGate https://t.co/La041jINt5

[Not Real Donald Trump @RealDonalDrumpf]

Stop calling it #PizzaGaetz! #KinkyMatt is getting very upset!

[Mike Pence - Professional Mannequin @vespertilioAJR]

That the Matt Gaetz underage sex trafficking investigation commenced under Trump's DOJ, is just beautifully bigly and tremendous.

[Not Real Donald Trump @RealDonalDrumpf]

Champ and Major pooped! Please focus on that and STOP RETWEATING this #GaetzGate video. Thank you.

[John Fugelsang @JohnFugelsang]

You can watch Derek Chauvin at his trial now; or wait & see him join Donald Trump onstage at a fundraiser next year.

[Not Real Donald Trump @RealDonalDrumpf]

I barely know Ghislaine Maxwell. I only went to parties with her one or two thousand times!