JaneTheOrnithologist

hi, im jane...an ornithologist. here to share my insights on misandry, smallholder agronomy, tax loopholes, and scientology. he/him

[JaneTheOrnithologist @JOrnithologist]

This account's name is inspired by an ornithologist I met at the LA Urban Nature Fest. Jane–the scientist–led me on a private tour of her underground bird lab, giving me a cursory introduction to ornithology. I hope to cross paths with Jane sometime soon, ideally not on Twitter.

[JaneTheOrnithologist @JOrnithologist]

@ourcolorblue kinda slay

[JaneTheOrnithologist @JOrnithologist]

@yunajng maybe get off twitter ☺️

[JaneTheOrnithologist @JOrnithologist]

wonder what all the men i know are doing backstage rn...maybe they just unscrew their head and hang it up to cool down. or maybe they plug themselves in to recharge.

[JaneTheOrnithologist @JOrnithologist]

the fact that exercising can make u feel happy is lw fucked. Like I gotta move myself around just to shake out the happy

[JaneTheOrnithologist @JOrnithologist]

@mitu0t I’m glad at least someone benefits from my phone addiction 💝🥺💝

[JaneTheOrnithologist @JOrnithologist]

erg —- my new Physical Ailment of the Semester that My Body Is Signaling Me I’m Stressed™ is that I perpetually feel like something js in the back of my throat and I need to cough it up 🖐💋 ...at least this is better than my stress nosebleeds of sophomore year ✊

[JaneTheOrnithologist @JOrnithologist]

My circadian rhythm has ...um... disappeared. I now just waddle between three hours of sleep and 6 hours of “being awake”

[JaneTheOrnithologist @JOrnithologist]

@yunajng oh how i miss having a large cold brew and then becoming too anxious to do any actual work,, ugh :( and also the drama and mystery and tacit romance with the other coffee shop goers 😩👀

[JaneTheOrnithologist @JOrnithologist]

@chelseaurmother academic simp

[JaneTheOrnithologist @JOrnithologist]

@chelseaurmother yea you caught me slipping

[JaneTheOrnithologist @JOrnithologist]

I really talk to men for free. The hypocrisy of wanting to end unpaid internships while I behave like this....

[JaneTheOrnithologist @JOrnithologist]

Why is cowboy like me the most precious song ever 🥺 I was tearing up listening to it “you’re a bandit like me, eyes full of stars” GOD IM EMBARASSING

[JaneTheOrnithologist @JOrnithologist]

I tried practicing mindfulness and listened to my resting thoughts. Turns out I really just have a taylor swift juke box playing in my brain incessantly

[JaneTheOrnithologist @JOrnithologist]

anyone else kinda sick and tired of tyler siwft? #folktime

[JaneTheOrnithologist @JOrnithologist]

This is a picture I took of a really good couch by a window.

[JaneTheOrnithologist @JOrnithologist]

I’m only interested in lifting weights so I can move heavy obect...not to build muscle. I simply wish to be able to lift a car with a twink body

[JaneTheOrnithologist @JOrnithologist]

it's concerning that I'm not already verified,, @bellahadid can you make that a top priority action item?

[JaneTheOrnithologist @JOrnithologist]

Interesting how homework and dodging motherly emotional manipulation consumed 10 and 80 percent of my smooth brain respectively. In their absence, I have too much time to share my uninvited opinions.

[JaneTheOrnithologist @JOrnithologist]

Therefore, when we an 8000 sqft "home" with 7 bathrooms, it's actually a higher proportion of sqft/bathroom at 1142. And this is why we should ALL be sympathizers of mansion owners, as they may need to walk an extra 20ft to a bathroom.

[JaneTheOrnithologist @JOrnithologist]

For those wondering about the seemingly prodigal amount of bathrooms in McMansions, let me explain: For an average home (2,500 sqft) with usually ~3 bathrooms, the ratio of sqft/bathroom = 833.