Jordan Hagen

From Las Vegas. Currently in Exile in Missouri. Send Donations to yo crying mommas.❤️

[Jordan Hagen @JPHickel]

@philip_the_4th I swear I spelled Miike Snow right the first time

[Jordan Hagen @JPHickel]

@philip_the_4th Fuck it:

Pat Benatar
Kid Cudi
Kris Kristofferson
Lady Gaga
Cheap Trick
Arcade Fire
John Mellencamp
Devo
Mike Snow
Lou Reed

[Jordan Hagen @JPHickel]

@philip_the_4th I’d say it’s one of the most adult things a person could eat. Cheap and incredibly efficient.

[Chicago Bears @ChicagoBears]

#ProBowlVote + @KevinByard
#ProBowlVote + @KevinByard
#ProBowlVote + @KevinByard

[Chicago Bears @ChicagoBears]

League-leader in INTs: @KevinByard
League-leader in takeaways: @nahwrig

RT to #ProBowlVote them both ‼️

[Jordan Hagen @JPHickel]

@TheLuchaJoe 😂

[Jordan Hagen @JPHickel]

@SheaSerrano High Plains Drifter
Shane
The Cowboys
For a Few Dollars More

[Jordan Hagen @JPHickel]

@philip_the_4th 😂

[Jordan Hagen @JPHickel]

@peterbinggeser I would also add that total recall is contradictory to ambient intimacy. True human experience isn’t about being exact. The whole idea of this is tacky and gross. But I can definitely see the audience.

[Jordan Hagen @JPHickel]

@dan_bernstein
Thank you for making me laugh through some of the darkest days of my life in aspects both personal and that of being a Chicago sports fan. You are an emblem for critical thinking in an environment of hot takes. Suffer no fools.

[Jordan Hagen @JPHickel]

Can’t believe AI has gotten so powerful that it went back in time and wrote D2: The Mighty Ducks.

[Jordan Hagen @JPHickel]

The Kannapolis Cannonballers blocked me and hid my post because I said “there goes your Russian political refugee fanbase” to these uniforms. How Stalinist of them. 😂 (Never said I didn’t like the uniform, but way to take a joke guys)

[Jordan Hagen @JPHickel]

@Kcannonballers @Trevor_Wilt10 @MiLB @MiLBPromos @MiLBStore @whitesox @FutureSox @PipelineTo35th @SoxOn35th @KristaDestinee There goes the Russian political refugee fan base.

[John Cleese @JohnCleese]

Have we talked about the advantages of extremism lately? What did I miss?

[Jordan Hagen @JPHickel]

@philip_the_4th

[Jordan Hagen @JPHickel]

@LaurenceWHolmes
The 2024 Chicago Bears: Boldy Losing How No Team Has Lost Before

[Jordan Hagen @JPHickel]

@TheLuchaJoe Last play of the Bears game is laughing maniacally at you in the wings.

[Jordan Hagen @JPHickel]

I’ve reached my old age complacency with AI technology as I realized I can now insert myself into the opening credits of Gunsmoke and now die happy.

[Jordan Hagen @JPHickel]

@MrGeorgeWallace Top five favorite “ine”s. Turpent, red red w, Piñon P, David Carrad, and TashaDidntEarnThatEmeraldM-