Official Mayor of Wapella

2016 USA WORLD Skee Ball Champion. Olympic gold medalist in Skee ball. Pro softball player with his own Funko Pop. Been on MTV Cribs 👻Jacob_Short

[Official Mayor of Wapella @Jacob_Short]

Cause it’s still my fav thing!

[Official Mayor of Wapella @Jacob_Short]

Yo this shit was beyond funny omg

[Barstool Sports @barstoolsports]

Another POV has dropped

[Selene Mariposa @Selene_Mariposa]

The World Cup has turned America into a discovery channel for the rest of the world.

And they are not handling it well.
In the best possible way.

Here is what they are discovering:

Free public restrooms. Europeans pay every time.
Free water at every restaurant. Just appears.
Free refills. Coffee. Sodas. Iced tea. Unlimited.
Free chips and salsa before you even order.
Free warm bread with dinner.
Ice in drinks like civilized people.
Air conditioning everywhere. Not a moral debate. A fact.
Parking lots attached to the actual place you are going.
Drive throughs where the food comes to the car while you sit in it.
Ranch dressing by the gallon.
Tex-Mex that cannot be explained only experienced.
Dental care that actually works.
Buccee’s. There are no words for Buccee’s.

Then they found the grocery stores.

Five of them within one mile.
Each one the size of an aircraft hangar.
Burgers. Steaks. Brisket. Ribs. Pulled pork. Lamb. Veal. Every cut of every animal ever domesticated by human civilization available in one refrigerated aisle at ten in the morning on a Tuesday.

The Germans stood in the meat section for forty five minutes.
In silence.
Processing.

They finally understand why we do not have trains.

We have roads wide enough for the cars we actually drive.
Parking lots the size of small European countries.
Airports in every city worth visiting.

Why would we need trains.

The Germans are taking ranch home by the bottle.
The Dutch found queso and briefly lost the ability to speak.
The Japanese are photographing HEB like it is the Louvre.
The Czechs are weeping in West, Texas.

Welcome to America.
Everything is free, enormous, air conditioned, comes with chips, and has five grocery stores within a mile that will sell you any cut of any animal you have ever imagined.

Write that down. 🦋

[Official Mayor of Wapella @Jacob_Short]

@HappyPunch @arielhelwani Yoooo I’m dying. I was sitting at home going wtf is this guy doing? He acting like he getting in the ring tonighg

[Official Mayor of Wapella @Jacob_Short]

@DailyLoud More fake videos for complete morons of earth

[Official Mayor of Wapella @Jacob_Short]

@ChuckSunshine @Arabbeau Exactly ppl are so stupid thinking this is real

[Official Mayor of Wapella @Jacob_Short]

Best ufc entrance ever. Lmsooo!!!

[Paul Heyman @HeymanHustle]

I think it's time we all recognize the NBA has a great creative team and writers. Wow. What a story! Texas heels rout hometown heroes in the 1st half at the World's Most Famous Arena (@TheGarden ), only for the babyfaces to perform the greatest comeback EVER! My compliments!

[Official Mayor of Wapella @Jacob_Short]

@awesome_visuals I’ve been wondering what the chick from Roadhouse has been doing? Lmaooo!!

[Roman Reigns SZN 💥 @reigns_era]

The Full Entrance of El Grande Americano.

WHAT AN OVATION 🔥

#AAANocheDeLosGrandes 

[Wrestling Pics & Clips @WrestleClips]

This felt like the biggest match of the year.

Hope these guys got Wrestlemania-level paychecks for this.

They f*cking deserve it.

#AAANocheDeLosGrandes https://t.co/0SleMOEnAg

[Wrestling Pics & Clips @WrestleClips]

Bro this sh*t feels bigger than any Wrestlemania match this year.

THIS IS INCREDIBLE.

#AAANocheDeLosGrandes

[WWE @WWE]

There is only ONE El Grande Americano!!!

The "Original" is no more!

[Wrestling Pics & Clips @WrestleClips]

This entrance was f*cking surreal.

El Grande Americano is the most over wrestler in WWE right now.

Holy sh*t.

#AAANocheDeLosGrandes

[WWE @WWE]

The "Original" El Grande Americano has been UNMASKED!! 😱

It's CHAD GABLE!!!

[Triple Hausen’s Thoughts 💭 @TripleHHHPaulL]

The emotion you feel when you’re a German pretending to be an American pretending to be a Mexican luchador and you’ve not only been accepted, but anointed, as the biggest star in AAA because you’re truly one of them.

[Official Mayor of Wapella @Jacob_Short]

El Grande Americano vs Original El Grande Americano is the best match I ever seen in my life. There I said it!!!

[Official Mayor of Wapella @Jacob_Short]

Best entrance of all time? Up there in my book.

[Official Mayor of Wapella @Jacob_Short]

Man El Grande Americano entrance is giving full chills right now. This is mesmerizing!!! #AAA #WWE #wweyoutube