Jake Allen

Do the robot. Don't be one.

[Jake Allen @JakeAllenShow]

Feels like fall.. can’t wait to get my Pumpkin Spice on @dunkindonuts

[Jake Allen @JakeAllenShow]

I had access to cheat codes for #NBAJam but that’s NOT how you play basketball.

[Jake Allen @JakeAllenShow]

Matt Shultz of @CageTheElephant is defiantly crowd surfing ALL of @MagicofSPAC right now

[Jake Allen @JakeAllenShow]

Schweppes & pretzel sticks #bestsnackever

[Jake Allen @JakeAllenShow]

https://t.co/QZMlTv3HZd

[Jake Allen @JakeAllenShow]

Irish goodbyes with friends that get it is the best #smokebomb

[Jake Allen @JakeAllenShow]

Oil change at 2p on a Wednesday.. lobby looks like a bingo game is about to start #whitehaireverywhere

[Jake Allen @JakeAllenShow]

Every time an old person dies a library burns down #womansittingnexttomeatthediner

[Jake Allen @JakeAllenShow]

Janet Jackson’s thoughts on that Ciara performance #BillboardMusicAward

[Jake Allen @JakeAllenShow]

Kelly Clarkson is a monster #BillboardMusicAwards

[Ally Reid @ashallann]

Overheard in the office “my wife made that white broccoli stuff. Cauliflower” 😂😂😂

[Patton Oswalt @pattonoswalt]

If you are depressed or feeling suicidal please please please please please reach out to ANYONE. I never get to see Brody Stevens again I can’t stand this. #RIPBrodyStevens #818ForLife

[Jake Allen @JakeAllenShow]

It’s a one hand on my cup of coffee at all times kinda day #nosleepsummer #bottomsup

[Jake Allen @JakeAllenShow]

7yr old: daddy can you cut the tags off of this shirt?
Me: yup
7yr old: save them for the washing instructions
Me: what are washing instructions
7yr old: oh daddy

[Jake Allen @JakeAllenShow]

tomorrow should be fun #figureitout

[Jake Allen @JakeAllenShow]

I accidentally punch myself in the nuts about 4 times a year. Just tried putting the bath towel back on the rack and lit them up #notmybestmoments #whatdoesntkillyousometimesstillhurtsreallybadforawhile

[Scott Pank @ScottRadio]

I’ll be one of the celebrity guest for the Rashad Barksdale's Celebrity Softball Game at Joe Bruno Stadium on May 19th at 6 p.m! See ya this Saturday

[my book is better than my tweets @MichellCClark]

Fergie Anthem Reaction Power Rankings:
1. Empty eyed Draymond
2. Furrowed brow Joel
3. Lmao Chance
4. Jimmy Kimmel
5. Lemme not laugh on live TV Anthony Anderson https://t.co/g2AemKuOfF

[Scott Pank @ScottRadio]

Flannel Gang (Gucci Gang Parody) 😂
https://t.co/R305yUnZL0

[Ally Reid @ashallann]

Chin fil A coming to Albany airport. I have a feeling there's going to be a lot of people just sort of hanging out by security gate