Jeve Stobs

Good Old-Fashioned Lover Boy

[Jeve Stobs @JakeRussett]

patrick warburton has NOT worked as hard as he has in his illustrious career to be referred to as "joe swanson voice actor" delete this

[Jeve Stobs @JakeRussett]

if you dare

[Jeve Stobs @JakeRussett]

He sees you when you’re sleeping, he knows when you’re awake. He sees you back the car out of the driveway. He knows the garage code. He sees your office. He knows your computer password. He’s wiring your 401k to an offshore account in the Cayman Islands. You’re penniless, ruined

[Ben Crew @BenjaminCrew1]

Giving Charlie Brown Christmas a jazz score is probably one of the top 10 decisions in human history

[Jeve Stobs @JakeRussett]

god inventing queso: oh yeah, that’s the stuff

[Jeve Stobs @JakeRussett]

Jack Antonoff? I’d rather not

[Jeve Stobs @JakeRussett]

Got a bunch of snakes and lizards together and now they’re being passive aggressive and not talking to each other, call that ereptile dysfunction

[Jeve Stobs @JakeRussett]

@wearescoundrels This album is outrageously good, are you guys still together?? Any future tour dates in the works??

[Jeve Stobs @JakeRussett]

she’s an empath (she only eats the pink starbursts)

[Jeve Stobs @JakeRussett]

This man on the corner of E 35th and Second Ave S is helping direct traffic amidst power outages after last night’s storm.

An American hero, standing alone between all of us and total chaos.

@MinneapolisPD are you hiring traffic control officers??

[Jeve Stobs @JakeRussett]

he’s very neat

[Jeve Stobs @JakeRussett]

we need more women in stem and less men in gitis!

[Jeve Stobs @JakeRussett]

when dolphin’s cousin passed, he did not know what to do. did not know how he could go on. could not see how tomorrow would ever seem any brighter than today. life had always seemed to dolphin like it was so promising and full of hope, but now..

he had no porpoise

[Jeve Stobs @JakeRussett]

Sorry bro, can’t talk right now. I’m picturing myself in a boat on a river with tangerine trees and marmalade skies

[Jeve Stobs @JakeRussett]

Rabidly consuming Masayoshi Takanaka content

[Jeve Stobs @JakeRussett]

the 2024 presidential election but instead of debates and voting it’s just who can name more Sugar Ray songs

[Jeve Stobs @JakeRussett]

the existence of doritos implies the existence of reritos, miritos, faritos, soritos, laritos, tiritos, and doritos (octave)

[Jeve Stobs @JakeRussett]

God about to invent tomatoes: "if only this sandwich was sopping wet and disintegrating in my hands"