Jake Touzel

[Jake Touzel @JakeTouzel]

Had a dream where I opened a swimming pool for cats. Business was not good

[Jake Touzel @JakeTouzel]

Got my knives sharpened yesterday, cut my finger while slicing mushrooms today. Why must I pay in blood for an ingredient I don’t even like?

[Jake Touzel @JakeTouzel]

close the patullo. now make a truck driver hit the median on the alex fraser.

[Jake Touzel @JakeTouzel]

Why does Guy Fieri look like he’s running for leader of the NDP?

[Jake Touzel @JakeTouzel]

it's such a shame that the masters of the universe movie is gonna bomb

[Jake Touzel @JakeTouzel]

The future is bright. Say hello to MCU reboot Howard the Duck

[MCU Film News @MCUFilmNews]

Dacre Montgomery says he’s open to joining an #MCU project, but only with the right director.

"I would be interested in doing anything depending on the director."

(Source: https://t.co/F4cd19rH6A)

[Jake Touzel @JakeTouzel]

we really got morning radio show hosts talking about shooting americans before gta6

[Jake Touzel @JakeTouzel]

idk who needs to hear this but high beams do not help with fog

[Jake Touzel @JakeTouzel]

@NDP ok chatNDP

[Jake Touzel @JakeTouzel]

i've seen the video. i've watched it from every angle. the only logical conclusion I can come to is that michael rappaport should have gone home night 1.

[Jake Touzel @JakeTouzel]

if I only could, I’d drink a beer with god

[Jake Touzel @JakeTouzel]

dave chapellephaba

[Jake Touzel @JakeTouzel]

ethan slater is way too cool of a name for ethan slater to have

[Jake Touzel @JakeTouzel]

politicians wearing hard hats should be considered stolen valour

[Jake Touzel @JakeTouzel]

David Eby is the Hannah Berner of Canadian premiers

[Jake Touzel @JakeTouzel]

@betterlovers please

[Jake Touzel @JakeTouzel]

@RoughTrade Fontaines by a landslide

[Jake Touzel @JakeTouzel]

Sabrina Carpenter just started Halloween on August 28th

[Jake Touzel @JakeTouzel]

@BLABBERMOUTHNET

[Jake Touzel @JakeTouzel]

bittersweet symphony should be a top contender for worst song